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Chapter Four

After a last check that Ethan was asleep in a crib in her bedroom, Ellie headed downstairs. It was late and dark out. Was Reuben still dealing with trouble at work? Had he gone home and found her note?

She went into the kitchen to find her mother heating milk on the stove.

“He all settled in?” Mam asked.

“Ja.” She bit her lip.

“Want a cup of sweetened warm milk?”

Ellie nodded. She felt terrible that she hadn’t told her parents previously about cleaning house for Reuben Miller. She’d been afraid to mention him, considering what had happened between him and her sister Meg. Since arriving with Ethan, she had confessed everything. “Mam...”

Mam met her gaze. “Elizabeth Stoltzfus, I know what you’re going to say,” she scolded. “Don’t you dare apologize for not telling us about Reuben. I understand your concern, but you’re wrong. Dat and I have always liked Reuben. He was wonderful with Meg after the accident.”

“An accident he caused,” she pointed out.

“The accident wasn’t his fault. The fault, if anyone’s, belonged to the Englisher who hit Reuben’s buggy, then left.”

“They never found out who drove the car,” Ellie murmured.

“Nay, but it doesn’t matter. Meg and Reuben are both fine. Meg is happy with Peter and being mother to little Timothy.” Her mother smiled. “Reuben moved on, as well.”

Ellie nodded. “But life hasn’t treated him as kindly. His wife died only minutes after giving birth to that precious little boy in my room.”

“Is Reuben angry with his son?”

Ellie smiled, remembering the love in his gaze as Reuben had held his son. “Nay. He’s a gut vadder. He loves Ethan.”

Her mother filled three mugs of hot milk, then added sugar to each one. One for each of them and one for her father. “He’s a fine man. I’m glad you can help him.”

She was glad, too, but she doubted Reuben was. From what she’d encountered from him so far, he resented help—at least he did hers. He’d be here as soon as he read her note. He’d be angry, but she wouldn’t apologize. She’d done the right thing in bringing Ethan home with her.

Ellie decided to drink her milk on the front porch. She murmured good-night to her parents, then took a seat in a rocking chair outside. How long before Reuben’s arrival? For he would come. And he wouldn’t be happy when he did.

It was a pleasant night. The stars were out in full force, bright lights twinkling in a midnight sky. She caught sight of a shooting star and, despite her worries, she felt a moment’s contentment. There was something wonderful in caring for a child. Ethan Miller was precious, and she loved spending time with him. The fact that he took to her quickly made her feel special and loved. She was able to quiet him easily when he was tearful. He clung to her as if she were his mother and not a stranger.

Ellie set her empty cup down next to her chair and closed her eyes, then continued to rock. She’d been cleaning houses for years. She wanted a husband and children, but she couldn’t worry about that now, for she had her parents to think about. She would keep up her business until Charlie married, save her money for when she’d need it.

She rocked back and forth in the chair until she got sleepy. A rumble in the yard startled her awake, and she recognized the man who pulled up his buggy close to the house. Ellie inhaled sharply. Time to face Reuben Miller. The man had come for his son.

She stood as she watched him approach the house. He didn’t see her in the dark at first as he climbed the steps.

“Gut evening, Reuben,” she said from the porch railing. She saw him stiffen.

“Ellie,” he snapped, “where’s Ethan?”

“He’s upstairs sleeping,” she replied quietly.

“I’ve come to take him home.”

“I don’t think that’s wise, Reuben. He’s settled in for the night. Why can’t you let him sleep?”

“You had no right to take him.”

She froze. “I didn’t kidnap him, Reuben. I brought him here because I didn’t know what time you’d be home. Didn’t you see my note? I wrote that I’d bring him home in the morning.”

“He needs to be home now.”

She moved out from the shadows. The moon lent a glow to Reuben’s face. She could read tension in his features, the pain of misunderstanding. “It’s better if he’s allowed to sleep.” He looked exhausted, worried, and he probably needed the innocence of his baby son to ease his pain. She relented. “I’ll get him for you.”

His hand settled on her arm. “You’re right,” he said softly. “Don’t wake him.” He sighed. “’Tis been a long day. Do you mind if we sit a moment?”

“Please do.” She softened toward him further. “Would you like something to drink? Hot cocoa or hot sweetened milk?”

He leaned back in the twin rocking chair and closed his eyes briefly. “Hot cocoa would be nice.” He gazed at her, his expression stark and full of emotion. When she caught her breath, he closed off his emotions.

“I’ll be just a moment.” The water in the teakettle heated quickly. It took her but a moment to make him a cup of instant cocoa. She exited the house and handed him a mug, then sat down in the rocking chair. “It’s instant.”

He awarded her a slight smile. “It’s perfect.”

“Sarah left because something happened in Ohio,” she said. “Your father sent a car. Whatever it was, your dat doesn’t want you to worry. Sarah said she’d call tomorrow to let you know exactly what happened.”

Reuben frowned. “As if I won’t worry.”

“I promised Sarah that I’d watch Ethan until her return.”

He stiffened. “I’ll stay home to take care of him.”

“And miss work for how long?” She began to rock in the chair. His scent—earthy, male, pleasing to her sense of smell—reached out to her, intensifying her awareness of him. “I made your sister a promise, Reuben.”

“And you always keep promises,” he said bitterly.

“Ja. I do.” She stifled her anger. “I know you don’t want me at the house. If you prefer, I can ask Charlie to keep an eye on Ethan. She’s gut with children. But I refuse to ask her to be at the house all the time, just because you have a problem with me personally. I will watch your son, so you might as well accept it.” She paused. “I would never hurt Ethan.”

He stared at her silently with eyes like sapphires in the dark. His gaze made her uncomfortable.

“Say something.”

“What do you want me to say?” he asked. “You want me to admit that I don’t want you in my haus?”

Ellie blanched at the direct hit. Ignoring the shaft of pain, she lifted her chin. “I don’t care if you feel that way. It wouldn’t change anything. I promised Sarah I’d take care of Ethan, and I will make good on that promise.”

“With your sister,” he said huskily.

She shrugged, though she felt anything but casual about the situation. “If necessary.” She stood and went to the railing, giving him her back. “Since you seem fine with leaving your son here for the night, I’ll make sure we get him home before you leave for work in the morning. Let’s say by seven if not before. Will that work?”

He stood, handed her his empty mug. “Danki for the hot chocolate.”

She nodded. “Reuben?”

The man released a tired sigh. “Seven tomorrow morning will be fine. No need to come earlier.”

Without thought, Ellie placed a hand on his arm. She was shocked as she felt him tense, the muscle tightening. She withdrew quickly. He stared at her as if stunned that she’d touched him. A strange frisson of awareness cropped up between them.

Reuben looked away. “Good night, Elizabeth.”

She watched him descend the porch steps and head toward his buggy. “Good night, Reuben,” she murmured. He must have heard her, for he stopped and gazed at her for several long seconds before he climbed into his vehicle and left for home.

* * *

The next morning before seven, Ellie steered the buggy toward the Reuben Miller house. Charlie sat beside her holding Ethan. She flashed her a glance. “Are you sure you don’t mind watching him this morning?”

“Not at all. You know I love children, and this little one,” she said with affection, “is a sweetheart.”

Ellie smiled at her sister. “I have one house to clean this morning. It won’t take me long before I can relieve you.”

“That’s fine. I promised Nate I’d stop by to check on the progress of the farmhouse.” Charlie grinned. “I’m excited to marry Nate. I never thought I’d ever be this happy,” she confessed softly.

“You’ve liked him for a long time. It took him a while to see you for who you are.” She recalled the difficulty the two had had getting together. “You’re meant to be with him. You love him.”

“I do.” Charlie shifted Ethan so he could look out the window as Ellie turned onto Reuben’s driveway. “Look, Ethan! There’s your dat!”

The child made a sound of pleasure as he recognized his father. Ellie pulled the buggy close to the side door, where Reuben waited.

She climbed out and took Ethan from Charlie until her sister alighted and reached for the little boy. “Gut morning, Reuben,” she greeted.

He nodded, his expression sober, until his gaze settled softly on his son. “Was he any trouble?” he asked Charlie.

“None,” Ellie said tautly, refusing to be ignored. “He slept through the night and I fed him before we left the haus.”

He studied her briefly as Charlie handed him his son. “Ethan,” he murmured, his eyes soft, as he took him into his arms.

“Reuben,” Charlie greeted as she skirted the buggy with a smile. “I hadn’t realized that you moved into our district.”

Ellie waited for his expression to darken, but to her shock, he grinned. “I have a lot of work to do to this place yet, but ’tis home.” She watched her sister and Reuben converse easily. Hurt, she turned and climbed into the buggy. Why didn’t he like her? Why was Charlie acceptable as Meg’s sister but not her? Her attention skimmed over him briefly before she addressed her sister. “I’ll see you later, Charlie.” To her relief, her sibling nodded without saying another word.

“Have a gut day,” Reuben told her gruffly, almost reluctantly. Then, dismissing her, he kissed his son on the forehead before he waved Charlie toward the house. “Come in, and I’ll show you around.”

Swallowing against a suddenly tight throat, Ellie picked up the leathers, then left, heading to the Broderick household, her first and only cleaning job of the day.

The Broderick house was in the opposite direction from her house, but Ellie didn’t mind the drive. The weather was nice and she needed the time to relax. Her brief encounter with Reuben had agitated her. That he could be so friendly to Charlie and not to her bothered her. A lot.

She drove up the Broderick driveway and parked her buggy near the garage. She tied her horse to the handle of the garage door, then grabbed her cleaning supplies before heading toward the house.

Ellie climbed the stoop and knocked on the glass outer door. Within seconds, the door opened, revealing Olivia Broderick. “Mrs. Broderick,” she murmured in greeting.

Without a word, Olivia opened the door for her. Her gaze shot past Ellie to where she’d parked the buggy. “I don’t want you parking your horse in the driveway,” she said. “If he takes a dump on my pavers, you’ll have to clean it up.”

Ellie nodded. “Is there someplace else you’d like me to park?”

The woman sniffed. “I’d rather you not park anywhere near our property.”

“Where, then?”

“I don’t care, Eleanor,” she said with disdain. “Just not here.”

Drawing a calming breath, Ellie nodded. Her name wasn’t Eleanor, but the woman continued to call her that whenever she was unhappy with her. Why had she agreed to continue working for these people? Did she need their money that badly?

“Upstairs today?” Ellie asked.

Olivia nodded. “The boys’ rooms are a mess. If you could start with them, then head down to the main floor, that would be great.”

Nodding, Ellie headed toward the stairs and climbed to the second floor, fearing what she’d find once she entered the woman’s sons’ rooms. In one room there were clothes scattered across the floor. She stared at them, then left the room and headed to a second bedroom. The floor was clean, the room tidy. She dusted the furniture, then went into a hall closet to get out the vacuum cleaner. After she vacuumed the rug, she put it away, then headed downstairs.

“That didn’t take long,” Olivia said.

“I did your youngest’s room. Your other son’s floor is covered with clothes. I clean houses,” she said. “I don’t do maid service or laundry.”

The woman narrowed her gaze at her. “Perhaps you’d prefer to work someplace else.”

“If you’d like.” Ellie took her cleaning supplies and headed toward the door.

“Wait.”

Ellie stopped and turned. She had a feeling that no one else would work in the house, that Olivia had never expected that Ellie—an Amish woman—would dare walk away from a job. “Yes?”

“If you leave,” the woman said with a dark smile, “I won’t ask you back.”

A harsh laugh escaped from Ellie’s lips. “Have a good day, Mrs. Broderick.” Then she exited the house, feeling better about her day as she stowed her supplies on the backseat.

“Wait!” The woman had followed her outside.

Ellie turned and watched the woman’s approach, her gaze anxious.

“I’m sorry,” Olivia said. “I...” She blinked, looking devastated. “Please stay. I need your help. I’m sorry I’ve been grouchy. I just learned I have cancer.” She bit her lip. “Please. You don’t have to do John’s room. Will you finish the rest of the house?”

Heart welling with compassion, Ellie softened toward her. “Yes, I’ll finish.” She grabbed her supplies from her buggy and turned...and saw gratitude in the other woman’s expression. She followed Olivia into the house and went right to work.

Ellie finished the Brodericks’ home by eleven thirty and headed to the Miller house to relieve Charlie. In the end, she’d gone ahead and cleaned John’s room. How could she not? But to her surprise, Olivia Broderick had picked up the clothes and put them in a laundry basket while Ellie cleaned her son Robert’s room. As she steered the buggy down the road, she felt pleased with how well her morning went. Before she left, she promised to clean for Olivia toward the end of next week.

The woman had apologized more than once for her behavior. Ellie learned that she had just started her chemotherapy treatments, and Olivia confessed she already felt weak. Ellie couldn’t imagine dealing with cancer or the long road ahead that Olivia faced. If she could help in any way, Ellie decided, she would be there for the woman. It was the least she could do when the Lord had blessed her with so much.

She caught sight of the Miller house and smiled. She would pray for Olivia Broderick. And she would live in the moment, enjoying little Ethan, who had quickly captured her heart.

* * *

Reuben was bone-tired. After a long day of work yesterday followed by a sleepless night, he felt exhausted. Alone with Ethan, how would he get any rest? He loved his son, enjoyed every moment he had with him, but today he felt awful. He worried that he wouldn’t be the kind of father he should be.

He hadn’t heard from Sarah. Had she called while he was gone? He was worried. It wasn’t like his parents to call her home at a time they knew he needed her. Had something happened to his father? His mother?

“Hallo! I’m home!” he called as he entered the house through the side door. “Anyone here?”

Carrying Ethan on her hip, Ellie entered the kitchen from the great room. Expecting Charlie, he was taken aback to see her.

She smiled at him. “Hallo, Reuben, did you have a gut day?”

“What are you doing here?” he demanded.

“I’m watching Ethan, like I told you I would.”

“I thought you had to work today.” He heard the harshness in his tone and wondered why she brought out the worst in him. Because he found her attractive and didn’t want to?

“I finished the job this morning. When I was done, I came to relieve my sister.” Her eyes narrowed, as if daring him to complain. “Is my presence here a problem?”

“Ja,” he bit out, then felt terrible when her face fell. “Nay,” he revised. “’Tis not a problem. I know you take good care of Ethan...”

“Then why are you so angry with me?” she whispered.

He shook his head, unable to explain, and the sight of her blinking back tears floored him. “I’m sorry. I’ve had a lousy day. I shouldn’t have taken it out on you.” He gave her a gentle smile. “Will you forgive me?”

Ellie appeared surprised, then her expression softened with understanding. “I know what it’s like to have a bad day,” she murmured. Ethan shifted in her arms and patted her cheek with his chubby little hand. She grinned and ran a finger across his baby-soft cheek. “Are you hungry?” she asked Reuben.

“I could eat,” he said. A funny feeling settled in his chest as he watched the two of them.

“Have you tasted the chicken corn chowder Sarah and I made yesterday? And there’s strawberry pie.”

He blinked, shook his head. “I didn’t know there was soup and pie.” He studied her through tired eyes. “I guess I’ve been too tired to look. You taught her how to make my favorite meal.”

“Sarah made the pie. I just gave her the recipe.”

His chest tightened and his heart pumped hard as he gazed at her. “I haven’t been home much lately.” He suddenly realized that he hadn’t gone grocery shopping. There had been only sandwich fixings and a few breakfast foods left in the house. “You must have bought groceries. How much do I owe you?”

“Nothing.” Ellie dismissed his concern. The room lit up with the warmth of her smile. “I picked up a few things but the rest I brought from home.”

“Ellie—”

“Reuben, if you want to buy some groceries yourself, I can make a list for you.”

She placed his son in his arms, as if she were the boy’s mother and had done it many times in Ethan’s young life. He didn’t want to think about the implications of his thoughts. As he held and jostled Ethan, Reuben watched as Ellie opened the refrigerator and pulled out a bowl. Next she ladled a measure of the bowl’s contents into a pan she took out of the cabinet. She then set it on the stove and turned on the heat. Watching her work, he was glad that the gas stove was new—it was the first thing he’d bought for the kitchen when he’d moved in three weeks ago.

As the soup warmed, Ellie turned toward him with a smile. “Would you like crackers with your soup?”

He stared at her, transfixed. “We have crackers?”

She laughed. “Ja, there are oyster crackers. Sarah mentioned that you liked them.”

Reuben scowled. “What else did Sarah say?”

“That you’re a pleasant fellow mostly,” she quipped, her smile lingering.

He opened his mouth to retort, but her good humor made him grin as she turned and pulled out an iced tea pitcher from the refrigerator.

“I made sun tea,” Ellie said. She poured him a glass, then reached out to caress Ethan’s head. The brief maternal gesture affected him like a kick to his belly. “Soup should be ready soon.” She held out her arms. “May I hold him while you eat?” She eyed him carefully. “You should sit. You appear about ready to keel over.”

He wanted to argue with her but couldn’t. She made him feel things he didn’t want to feel. But how could he object to her babysitting when she was obviously good with Ethan?

She stirred the soup, then started to ladle it into a bowl she’d taken out of a top cabinet. “How much would you like? I know you’re tired, but you need to eat to keep up your strength.”

He’d been ready to tell her he wasn’t hungry, but then he smelled her soup. The scent of chicken corn chowder wafted through the kitchen, and he suddenly had an appetite. His stomach growled.

She chuckled. “That hungry, ja?” She regarded him over her shoulder with a twinkle in her pretty blue eyes. She narrowed her gaze. “When was the last time you’ve eaten?”

“I had breakfast this morning. A sausage sandwich from Whittier’s Store. I ate it in the car on the way to the job site.”

“You didn’t eat lunch?” she scolded.

Instead of annoyed, he found himself amused. “I had a bag of pretzels and a bottle of cola around midday.”

She made a tsk sound. “Reuben, you need to eat better or you’ll get sick.”

He arched an eyebrow at her, and she blushed. “Sorry,” she mumbled.

She turned her attention back to his soup bowl, setting it on the kitchen table, out of Ethan’s reach. Then she opened the box of oyster crackers before reaching for Ethan.

He studied her a long moment, and she reddened. Was she feeling it, too? he wondered as he gave her Ethan. This odd tension between them?

Ethan whimpered as Ellie cradled him with his head on her shoulder. She soothed him with a kiss on his forehead and gentle rubbing down his neck and back.

Reuben stared at her, his soup untouched. He tried to imagine Susanna with their son but couldn’t. He could only see Ellie, which made him feel angry and as guilty as if he’d sinned.

She froze, probably sensing his mood, and faced him. “You don’t like your soup?”

“I haven’t tried it yet.”

A light furrow settled between her eyebrows. “Why not?”

He shrugged, then dipped his spoon for a taste. Reuben hummed with pleasure. The chicken corn chowder was delicious. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d enjoyed a bowlful. He didn’t think Susanna had ever made it for him. He’d eaten it after they were married, but it was his mother who’d made the soup. In fact, his mother had done almost all of the cooking, with Susanna helping to clean up afterward.

He met Ellie’s worried gaze and smiled. “’Tis so gut. Danki.”

She grinned, looked relieved. “You’re willkomm. I enjoy cooking.”

“You do?”

She narrowed her gaze. “You’re surprised that I can cook?”

“I didn’t think you had time to spend in the kitchen with your haus-cleaning business.”

“I don’t clean haus all day, Reuben. Or I wouldn’t be here, would I? I worked this morning. One job only, which is how I prefer it. I may be asked to handle two jobs in a day, but it’s on rare occasions that I agree.”

He watched myriad emotions cross her face. “I see.”

“I like to be available for my parents if they need my help.”

Concern filled him. “Are they ill?”

“Nay. Nothing like that.” She shook her head. “It just doesn’t seem right not to pull my weight at home.”

He’d been tired, but Ellie’s soup had revived him. “Did you hear from Sarah today?”

“I’m afraid not.” Without asking, she refilled his soup bowl. He didn’t object. “I’m sure we’ll hear from her soon.” She smiled down at the child in her arms. “Do you own a high chair?”

“Nay, but I’ll buy one tomorrow.” His voice lowered. “I didn’t think about it. I’m sorry.”

Ellie looked at him. “What are you sorry for?” she said. “You have enough worries. We have an extra one at home that no one is using. Charlie can bring it with her tomorrow.”

“I can buy one for my son,” he said sharply, then looked away, immediately regretting his tone.

“I know you can,” she agreed. “Why don’t you borrow ours until you find the time to buy one?”

His lips firmed but he kept silent. He didn’t want her chair. He could buy or make Ethan a chair.

Ellie left the room. He’d sensed when she stiffened and felt the tension emanating in the air. Closing his eyes, he sighed. He was overwhelmed with emotion that confused him. What was it about this woman that made him feel this way?