Читать книгу: «No Way Out»

Friday, 5 June 2009 – 8.50

‘I’ve got butterflies in my stomach, Gene,’ said Andi as the car snaked its way through the streets of Los Angeles.

‘It’s too late to go back now.’

They both laughed. This was becoming a bit of an in-joke between them. They had both been nervous about leaving the Big Apple and crossing the continent to a new life on the West Coast. But Andi’s career had demanded it.

Andi Phoenix, sitting silently and brooding nervously, was in her late thirties. She had kept her looks through healthy eating, regular workouts and a bit of cosmetic surgery. Her breasts had been enhanced from 34B to 36D with silicone implants and she had taken a Botox injection to remove the first lines of age. But the rest was from hard work and healthy living. The blonde hair came from a bottle; the original had been a decent but boring mousy brown. Changing the color had been a form of therapy after the rough ride of her youth, but the enhancements as a whole carried with them the payload of attention from men that she could well do without. She was a few inches shorter than the black woman who sat next to her and in some ways felt in her shadow.

Gene touched Andi’s forearm gently. ‘Just remember this, honey: they don’t know you either. But they were ready to take a chance on you.’

In the driver’s seat, in more ways than one, was Eugenia Vance, the six foot, muscular black woman who had playfully wrestled with her in bed that morning, and won – as always.

They had met over twenty years ago, when Andi was still in her teens. Gene had helped Andi through her teenage crisis years, and they’d been together ever since. In all the time they had known each other, they never used the word ‘lesbian’ to describe their relationship. It wasn’t denial. It was just that their every instinct railed against categorization. Neither Gene nor Andi loved ‘women’, they simply loved each other.

‘I’m just wondering if this whole thing is a big mistake.’

Gene snorted her mockery at Andi’s self-pity. ‘You’ve picked a hell of a time to start wondering, girl!’

Here in California, Andi’s specialty was much in demand. She had majored in psychology before going on to get her Juris Doctor degree from the Northeastern University School of Law where she thrived amidst its progressive atmosphere that encouraged social responsibility. But after graduation she had found the law to be an irritating environment in which to work. Most of her criminal work involved plea bargaining rather than trial work and usually that meant helping criminals plead guilty to lesser charges – hardly the service of justice and way off from the ideals that had driven her into the legal profession in the first place.

Matters had come to a head after she contracted pneumonia, forcing her to take a prolonged leave of absence from the law firm that had initially hired her. But when she went back to work, she found herself welcomed with less than open arms. She was protected by labor laws from outright dismissal, but found herself increasingly sidelined. She joined another firm but then spent the next eight months playing catch-up.

It was in this period that her interest in the subject changed. Although there were innocent people out there who needed to be helped, criminal law meant – for the most part – helping the guilty. And that was not something she particularly enjoyed doing. So she did the old poacher turned gamekeeper routine and got herself a job with the D.A.’s office, in the domestic violence unit, where she thrived for a while. Starting at the bottom of the ladder meant that she didn’t get to do much courtroom work. Most of it involved working directly with victims, reading reports and collating evidence. But she was happy to do this. It gave her a sense of purpose.

Paradoxically, it was only when promotion gave her more courtroom work that disillusion set in for a second time. Because she found herself doing exactly the same thing as she was doing before, but from the opposite side of the table: plea bargaining with criminals. She found their lawyers to be vile, for the most part, and she realized how contemptible she must have seemed to the D.A. in her earlier days as a defense attorney.

At the same time, she had developed another interest: crime victim litigation. There was a growing industry involving the pursuit of civil remedies for crime victims and she very much wanted to be part of it. The only trouble was that she soon hit the glass ceiling and realized that this specialized field was more developed on the West Coast than on the East. She wasn’t altogether comfortable about moving out West. But that was where the work opportunity took her.

‘And what if I don’t make the grade?’ asked Andi, still seeking reassurance.

‘Hey, listen,’ said Gene firmly, ‘I don’t want to hear any of that. There’s nothing to stop you except fear – and if you let that get to you, I’ll be right behind you, ready to take a paddle to that cute little butt of yours.’

‘My butt’s not so little,’ said Andi, but this time with humor rather than self-pity.

In truth, Andi’s butt was fine, as any red-blooded male would have been only too happy to testify.

There was a hard edge to Gene. But it was precisely Gene’s confidence in decision making that Andi loved most. On all the important matters, it was Gene who decided for both of them. It was Gene who had decided that they would come to live out here in California. Andi would never have demanded it for herself, much as she had wanted it. She still lacked the self-confidence to stand up to Gene – to the world yes, but not to Gene. And Gene herself knew that Andi needed to make the move for her career. It wasn’t in Gene’s personal interests to make the move, but she cared too much for Andi to let that stand in their way.

So when it came to the crunch, Gene was ready to uproot herself and start again on the other side of the country. It’s only a sacrifice if you give up the greater value for the lesser one, she told herself, remembering the philosophy that had given her so much strength when she really needed it. Andi’s happiness means more to me than my two-bit career. So it isn’t really a sacrifice.

What Gene loved about Andi was that she was gentle and soft on the outside yet fiery and determined when her sense of injustice was aroused. It was a paradox that was expressed as eloquently in Andi’s eyes as in her words. Her eyes had a kind of magic that was as frightening as it was fascinating: those eyes could look both menacing and vulnerable at the same time. It was Andi’s eyes that Gene had originally fallen in love with. When Gene looked into Andi’s eyes the first time they met, the beseeching, helpless look quickly dissolved into anger…no, not anger…tenacity.

As the car slowed down, Gene gave Andi an encouraging smile and then looked around at the office buildings of the town center. Andi smiled back, encouraged by Gene’s contagious confidence.

‘Looks like we’re here,’ said Gene, with an air of finality.

The car pulled up to a halt in front of a large office building.

‘Wish me luck,’ Andi said, taking a deep breath.

Gene looked at her firmly, ‘I won’t do that, honey, ‘cause you don’t need luck.’

Gene slid her left hand behind Andi’s head, leaned over and kissed Andi on the lips. She had a way of making Andi feel good whenever the fear and self-doubt threatened to get the better of her.

That’s why I love you, Gene, thought Andi, closing her eyes. But she didn’t say it. She just held on a moment longer than Gene did, before letting go and getting out of the car. She wanted to say something, but the jitters were still with her and she knew that Gene could sense it.

‘Get in there and knock ‘em dead, honey!’

Andi closed the door and walked towards the building. Ignoring the names of the countless law and accountancy firms on the nameplates, she walked into the building and presented her ID to security.

Outside, Gene watched Andi enter the building like a mother watching her tearful five-year-old vanish into the crowd of other children on her first day at kindergarten. Then she brought the engine to life with a roar, made an aggressive U-turn and drove back the way she’d come. She knew it was going to be a tough day for Andi – first days always are.

Her thoughts were cut short by her cell phone. It was a call from the Say No to Violence rape crisis center.

‘Hallo,’ said Gene, pressing the button of the hands-free set.

‘Gene, we’ve just had a call from Riley.’

Bridget Riley worked at the sex crimes unit in the local police department. And a call from Bridget Riley probably meant only one thing: another woman had been raped.