Цитаты из аудиокниги «Трое в лодке, не считая собаки / Three Men in a Boat (To Say Nothing of the Dog)», страница 7

how bad we were – bad from a medical point of view, of course. We were all feeling bad, and we were quite nervous about it. Harris said he had such a very bad headache that he hardly knew what he was doing. And then George

It is a most extraordinary thing, but when I read a medicine advertisement I usually come to the conclusion that I am suffering from the disease that was described. One day I went to the British Museum to read about hay fever 1, I fancy I had it 2. I took the book, and read all I needed; and then I idly turned the leaves, and began to study diseases, generally. Immediately I understood that I had some fearful, devastating illness. I sat for a while, frozen with horror; and then, in despair, I again turned over the pages. I came to typhoid fever 3 – read the symptoms – discovered that I had typhoid fever, must have had it for months without knowing it – wondered what else I had got; turned up St. Vitus’s Dance 4 – found, as I expected, that I had that too, – and so started alphabetically. I had every malady they wrote about! The only malady I had not got was housemaid’s knee 5

Не знаю почему, но когда я вижу кого-нибудь спящим, в то время как я бодрствую, я прихожу в ярость. Так мучительно быть свидетелем того, что бесценные часы земного существования, быстротечные мгновения, которых ему уже никогда не вернуть, человек попусту тратит на скотский сон.

Равным образом ни мясо, ни земляника со сливками не были в восторге – наоборот, им явно не хотелось оставаться там, куда они попали.