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Excerpt

LULLABY FOR TWO

How could Vince promise Tessa more than “now”?

How could he consider being the husband she needed when he’d failed at it once before? When he’d never had a role model to see how it should be done? Maybe that’s what had kept him from staying twenty years ago. Maybe that’s what kept him from moving them forward now. Tessa deserved someone who would put her first, romance her, court her, be steadfast and committed. He didn’t know if he was capable of that.

For now he was committed to Sean, and that’s all he knew.

CHILD’S PLAY

“You have an interesting effect on me.”

“Oh?” Diana held her head up, refusing to give in to the trembling nervousness that had overtaken her with Jason’s words. “What effect is that?”

“When I’m with you, I forget all about anything else. You make me forget myself.”

“That’s interesting. When I’m with you, I’m even more aware of myself than usual.” Aware of the way her body responded to his, of the sensual, sexual woman underneath the maternity clothes and sensible shoes.

She was aware of him, too – of the subtle, woodsy

scent of his aftershave and of the tiny white scar in the left corner of his upper lip. She noticed the way his right eyebrow quirked upwards whenever he smiled and the way the soft white cotton of his cuffs contrasted with the golden tan of his skin.

She was very aware of being drawn to him, of her breath quickening as he stood so close to her, of leaning towards him, lips parted.

Their eyes met, and she saw her own desire reflected. He put a hand on her arm, though whether to steady himself or to draw her close, she couldn’t say. He inclined his head slightly and she waited, not daring to breathe.

Lullaby for Two

by

Karen Rose Smith
Child’s Play

by

Cindi Myers

MILLS & BOON®

www.millsandboon.co.uk

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Lullaby for Two

by

Karen Rose Smith

Karen Rose Smith has seen more than sixty novels published since 1991. Living in Pennsylvania with her husband – who was her college sweetheart – and their two cats, she has been writing full-time since the start of her career. She enjoys researching and visiting the West and Southwest where this series of books is set. Readers can receive updates on Karen’s latest releases and write to her through her website at www.karenrosesmith.com, or at PO Box 1545, Hanover, PA 17331, USA.

To my mother, Romaine Arcuri Cacciola, my mother-in-law, Rita Smith, and my husband’s cousin DeSales Sterner – my baby experts. Mom and Reet – I miss you. Sis – my son’s godmother and my special friend – thanks for always being there.

Chapter One

Vince Rossi stood in shock in front of the receptionist’s sliding-glass window.

He’d known he’d probably have to deal with his past at some point. But reading the third name on the placard beside the window, he knew that karma was ready to bite him in the butt today.

He studied the letters of Dr. Tessa McGuire’s name as if somehow they’d change before his eyes. But they didn’t. She was one of the pediatricians in this practice and he’d have to deal with it. He had a two-out-of-three chance of Sean’s chart not landing in her stack. Those weren’t bad odds.

The seven-month-old baby nestled in Vince’s arm gurgled and stared up at him with sparkling blue eyes. Vince’s heart melted just as it had from the moment he’d first held the little boy. Was it possible he’d become Sean’s legal guardian only two and a half months ago? Only a week ago he’d returned to his hometown of Sagebrush, outside of Lubbock, Texas, in an attempt to find Sean the medical attention he needed, as well as put them both on the pathway to a new life. Vince had been impressed by the Family Tree Health Center where this pediatric practice as well as obstetrical, counseling, ophthalmological and a few other specialty practices were located.

The receptionist had finished her call and opened the glass window, staring at Vince expectantly.

“Sean Davidson’s the patient, but I’m his legal guardian—Vince Rossi. Our appointment is for eleven-thirty,” Vince said.

The woman checked off his name on the list in front of her. But before she could utter a word, the door to the waiting area opened.

Tessa McGuire appeared.

Her blond hair was still soft and wavy on her shoulders, her forget-me-not-blue eyes bright, her face mature in its beauty now. It had been twenty years since Vince had last seen her.

“Sean Davidson,” she called cheerily. Then her gaze fell on Vince, recognized him, and her whole body went perfectly still.

Vince knew there was no use pretending. No point skirting the issue. Too much was at stake for Sean.

He strode forward and stopped in front of her. “I didn’t know we’d be assigned to you. I’m Sean’s legal guardian. If you’ll have a problem treating him, I can find another doctor.”

Tessa had always been the perfect lady, the well-bred daughter of one of the richest ranchers in Sagebrush. She was pale now, as if the shock of seeing Vince had affected her physically. He knew the feeling. Acid burned in his gut.

Sean wriggled in his arms and cooed, reminding Vince of why he was here. He repositioned the baby in his arm, careful of Sean’s injured shoulder.

Tessa was watching, missing nothing. Finally she spoke. “Treating Sean won’t be a problem. Please follow me.”

So polite. So proper. So ready to do what she thought was right.

She’d thought going home to her father was right…divorcing Vince was right…forgetting they’d ever been married was right.

He followed her, almost curious what the privacy of an examination room might reveal. His body was already warning him that twenty years hadn’t made a difference in his attraction to her. Tessa McGuire had always turned him on more quickly than any other woman. Apparently, that hadn’t changed.

Awkward silence settled over the small room.

Tessa was studying him as he mentally ticked off the differences she’d see. At thirty-eight, there were strands of gray in his black hair. A scar from an arrest-gone-bad marred his left jaw. After he’d left Sagebrush, Air Force conditioning had put muscles on his lean body. After that, a workout regimen had kept him conditioned as a homicide detective.

He gave them both a few seconds to absorb the shock of seeing each other again. Finally he asked, “Do you want Sean on the table?”

In this examination room, colorful cartoon characters walked and danced and played on the walls in artistically drawn murals. Sean was looking all around, fascinated by them.

In answer to Vince’s question, Tessa took a few steps forward and stopped. “I’ll take him.” She reached for his son.

Vince thought of Sean as his son even though he hadn’t formally adopted him yet. He was waiting until they settled into a permanent place.

Transferring Sean to Tessa seemed to have an electric effect on them both. As her hands slid around the baby, they brushed Vince’s chest. He caught a glimpse of startled awareness in Tessa’s eyes as she tucked Sean into her arms, ducked her head and carried the little boy to the table.

Sean didn’t seem to mind being held by her. He looked up at Tessa, waved his good arm and gurgled as if saying hello.

The expression on Tessa’s face was so tender, so caring that Vince suddenly understood she’d become a pediatrician because while she’d never bear children of her own, in this specialty she could take care of everyone’s kids.

As she settled Sean on the table, she asked, “How long have you been back in Sagebrush?”

“We drove in from Albuquerque last Monday.”

Her gaze lifted to meet his. Then she quickly glanced away, concentrated on his baby again, took Sean’s temperature with the ear thermometer, and offered him her finger—maybe to test his grip. After tickling his tummy, she warmed her stethoscope with her palm before slipping it under Sean’s T-shirt.

Vince took the opportunity to study Tessa again. Under her white coat decorated with cartoon characters, she wore a light blue, silky blouse and navy skirt. Her navy shoes had a small heel, just high enough to delineate the curves of her legs. She was as slender as she’d been as a teenager, as slender as she’d been before she’d gotten pregnant.

Vince veered away from thoughts and memories he’d tamped down for a very long time.

After she finished listening to Sean’s heart and lungs, she examined the rest of him, making a game of using the tongue depressor, gently looking into his ears with the otoscope, running her hands over his injured right shoulder and testing his range of motion.

Still concentrating on the baby, she told Vince, “I received Sean’s chart this morning. With his name different from yours…” She stopped. “I have to admit I skimmed the front of the form and just paid attention to the medical facts. If I’d studied it more carefully, I would have noticed your name, too.”

“Tessa, I meant it when I said I could go to another doctor.”

Now she looked him straight in the eye. “I don’t turn children away, Vince.”

Not even when you don’t want to be in the same room with their parents? He didn’t ask the question aloud.

“We might only be in Sagebrush until Sean’s shoulder problems are resolved,” he explained, thinking that would relieve any anxiety she might have about Sean being her patient.

“A shoulder injury like Sean’s is complex.” Again her gaze met his unswervingly. “We usually see brachial plexus injuries when a baby gets stuck during the birthing process. In this case, with a seat belt causing the shoulder injury, we have a similar situation. How did you hear about Dr. Rafferty?”

“Sean’s doctor in Albuquerque went to med school with him and said he’s top-notch. When I researched him on the Internet, I saw he specialized in these surgeries. So coming to Lubbock seemed to be the best decision I could make. I want the best for Sean.”

Although she hadn’t asked, he decided to give her a bit more personal information. Maybe then she’d share some of her own. “For the past thirteen years I’ve been a homicide detective with the Albuquerque P.D.”

Her gaze shot to his.

“After the Air Force, I wanted to do something that made a difference.” He paused and added, “I never imagined that when my partner and his wife designated me in their will to be their baby’s legal guardian, a car accident would take their lives and change mine.”

Tessa continued examining Sean as she absorbed that. “You’re a single dad?”

Tessa’s tone was distinctly removed. Was she just making conversation? Trying to find out about Sean’s situation? Or was her inquiry more personal than that?

“I’m not married. I never have been.” When Tessa’s eyes flashed a few silver sparks, he added, “I mean, except for us. Military service and then a police officer’s schedule were tough on relationships.”

After much soul-searching, Vince had realized he’d joined the Air Force to forget about Tessa…to wipe her pregnancy and their marriage out of his mind. After the Air Force, he’d focused on becoming a detective and had never looked back. It was still too painful.

However, now with Tessa listening to his every word, he knew he’d be looking back all the while he was in Sagebrush. Would she? He was too aware of her. Was she just as aware of him?

“Did you get a job with the Lubbock P.D.?” she asked nonchalantly, as if it didn’t matter.

That had been his intention, but then he’d found out about another position. “Do you remember Ryder Greystone?” Ryder had been one of their classmates in high school.

Tessa nodded.

“He’s with the Lubbock P.D. and I called him. He said sure, they could use me, but it turns out Sagebrush’s chief of police, Clinton Farmer, had a heart attack and took a leave of absence. The mayor was having a problem finding a temporary replacement. After recuperation from bypass surgery, Farmer intends to come back at the end of August. So I applied, had several long interviews over the phone and was appointed to the position.”

“You’re going to be chief of police in Sagebrush?” Her eyes were wide with her surprise.

“Don’t tell me you’re having trouble seeing me as a law-and-order kind of guy,” he joked. Maybe if they took a light touch, seeing each other again would be easier.

Tessa’s cheeks flushed. “Oh, it’s not that. I guess I thought you’d be living in Lubbock rather than Sagebrush. But if you’re chief of police—”

“I’m renting a one-story duplex on Whitehorse Road. What about you? Are you in Lubbock or living with your dad?” Walter McGuire would be in his late sixties now. Vince had seen a billboard advertising cutting horses from Arrowhead Ranch, so he guessed Tessa’s dad was still hard at work building up a legacy for her.

At the mention of her father, Tessa went quiet, readjusted Sean’s clothes so they were back in place, then scooped him up off the table. “I’m sharing a house in Sagebrush with two friends.”

Her tone seemed to say, Not that it’s any of your business. His mention of her father had put her on the defensive. He should have known better.

“Sean looks healthy, other than his shoulder, of course,” she assured Vince. “His chart says he has an appointment with Dr. Rafferty on June twelfth. If Dr. Rafferty believes surgery is not in order, then what are you going to do?”

“I’ll serve as chief of police until Farmer comes back, then maybe return to Albuquerque. Everything’s up in the air right now, Tessa. I’m just taking one day at a time.”

At the sound of her first name on his lips, her body seemed to stiffen, her shoulders becoming a little squarer. Then she was handing Sean over to Vince, this time very careful not to touch him. The awkwardness in accomplishing that emphasized the relationship they’d once had and the lack of even friendship between them now.

To cover her attempt to stay distant from him, if not his baby, Tessa asked, “So you’re exercising Sean’s arm every day?”

“Yes. And the woman I’ve hired to take care of him knows how to do it, too.”

Even as a teenager, Tessa had foregone perfume for more natural scents like fruity shampoos and lotions. Vince inhaled a hint of vanilla and strawberries that took him straight back to necking sessions with her in his beat-up pickup.

She crossed to the door and opened it. “Good luck with Dr. Rafferty. Make sure he sends me a report.” Her expression softened a little. “I know what a stress this must be…to be worrying about Sean.”

Their eyes locked and his heart pounded as he approached the doorway where she stood. Tessa pulled her gaze from his and touched Sean’s hand. The baby took hold of her finger and looked up at her with seven-month-old fascination.

Vince knew exactly how his son felt.

Tessa removed her finger from Sean’s fist. “Good luck, little one,” she murmured.

After Vince gave her a nod and a muttered, “Thanks,” he held Sean a little tighter and walked down the hall. How often had Tessa said those words before? How often had she looked at a baby and thought about her own? How often had she thought of him and blamed him for the hysterectomy she’d had no choice in having?

He might never know the answer. He and Tessa had been finished long ago. She obviously wanted to keep it that way.

Tessa hurried through the lobby of the Family Tree Health Center, hardly aware of the bright sunshine pouring in the plate-glass windows, barely noticing the photographs of children, moms and dads and families hung in casual to formal frames on the pale yellow walls. She was in a daze as she veered toward the coffee shop to the right of the main entrance, passed the bird-of-paradise potted plant and a ledge lined with pothos ivy.

Stopping to gain her focus again, she spotted the table where Emily Diaz and Francesca Talbot were sitting. She was late meeting them for lunch…late pulling herself together…late trying to push the image of Vince’s face out of her head…late trying not to remember the feel of baby Sean in her arms.

Vincent Rossi was back in Sagebrush and she was just going to have to deal with it.

Masterful at hiding what she didn’t want others to see, she’d found she could let her guard down with Emily and Francesca. The three of them not only lived in a refurbished Victorian together but had become best friends.

Francesca greeted her first, sleek chestnut hair slipping over her shoulder, her green eyes sparkling as she beckoned Tessa toward their table. A neonatologist, Francesca had her office on the second floor of the center. She had office hours all day Monday, but spent most of her time at the hospital with her tiny patients.

Emily Diaz’s big brown eyes were already studying Tessa as she approached the table. Emily had pulled her curly black hair back from her face and fastened it with a navy scrunchie. Wearing Dr. Madison’s staff smock—Emily was his obstetrical nurse—she could fade into the background if she wanted to and usually did want to. Tessa still didn’t know why. Emily had only lived with her and Francesca for five months, but the empathetic way she had of listening had endeared her to both of them. Although Tessa realized they didn’t know her whole story yet, she didn’t push. Emily would tell them in time.

“We ordered the grilled-chicken salad for you and the peach iced tea. Is that okay?” Francesca asked.

They were usually short on time and both Emily and Francesca knew Tessa always ordered the same lunch.

“That’s fine,” she assured her with a distracted wave of her hand, taking her seat and dropping her purse to the floor.

“Rough morning?” Francesca asked.

Was it so obvious? Was she pale? Did the strain show? Had Vince realized how he had affected her?

Slipping the lemon slice off the side of her water glass, she squeezed it then dropped it in. After taking a few sips, she made sure that when she breathed in and then out it was deep and even.

“What happened?” Emily asked her, her concern obvious. “Problems with a patient?”

Tessa never discussed specifics about her patients and both women knew that. They were bound by the same terms of confidentiality. But they could talk in general terms.

“No, not a patient,” Tessa replied quietly.

Her friends waited expectantly.

Tessa glanced around and saw that at their corner table they had relative privacy. “A ghost from my past walked into my office today.” That was all she could say. Although Vince wasn’t her patient, his son, Sean, was.

After exchanging a look with Emily, Francesca asked, “Not Vince Rossi?”

Because Tessa had lived with Francesca since her return to Sagebrush from California two years ago, the neonatologist had known Tessa’s story. On the other hand, Emily, who had lived in Corpus Christi all of her life until her recent move to Sagebrush, only knew Tessa had had a hysterectomy, not the whole story behind it. It wasn’t that Tessa hadn’t wanted to confide in Emily, she just hadn’t wanted to dredge it all up again. The hysterectomy had affected her life and still affected it now. She’d discussed it with her two friends when she’d decided to apply to become an adoptive parent, but not why or how it had happened.

“Who’s Vince Rossi?” Emily asked.

Tessa dropped her chin into her hands, rubbed her face, pushed back her hair and realized it was time Emily knew her history, too. Maybe excavating the hurt would remind her to stay away from Vince.

Of course she’d stay away from Vince! Once his little boy’s surgery was over, he’d be gone. That was Vince. He left.

After taking another sip of water, Tessa explained, “Vince and I met in high school.” Saying those words brought it all back…back to that morning in the library during her senior year when she’d been sitting in a far corner out of the way and hadn’t been able to keep her tears from falling.

She hadn’t known Vince well. He’d taken vo-tech courses and she’d taken academic preparation. She’d attended a private girls’ school until ninth grade, then had made a deal with her father. She’d go to any college he chose, if he’d let her attend public high school.

So there she was, tears falling down her face, when a deep voice at her side asked, “Are you okay?”

Vince Rossi was everything she shouldn’t have been attracted to, with his dark, handsome looks and brooding gray eyes, his wrong-side-of-the-tracks attitude. With few flirting skills and little experience, she’d been afraid to get close to him.

“I’m fine,” she’d told him, but her tears stated a different story.

He sat down beside her. “You don’t look fine.”

Back then she didn’t have close friends because her father had still controlled her life, her comings and goings and who she could bring to the house. Female classmates cut her out of their cliques. She was an outsider who couldn’t break into groups with friendships established since grade school. A couple of girls who did befriend her only tried because of her father’s wealth and what they could enjoy because of it. It hadn’t taken her long to catch on.

So because of all that, because she felt alone much of the time, she’d told Vince the truth. “We had to put my dog to sleep. He was my best friend and he had a stroke. I miss him so much.”

Vince’s expression had reflected kindness and her own sadness. “I know what it’s like to miss someone. My mom left when I was a kid.”

“My mom died when I was born,” she’d replied softly.

They’d gazed into each other’s eyes, and she’d fallen in love with Vincent Rossi right then and there.

“Tessa?” Francesca called her name, bringing her back to the present.

“Oh, I’m sorry, I—” She took a breath and moved her fork. “Vince and I connected. We more than connected.” She sighed. “Then I got pregnant that April. We waited until after graduation to tell my dad. Vince insisted on marrying me, so my dad disowned me.”

“You can’t be serious!” Emily knew Tessa and her dad were close now.

“Oh, I’m very serious. Vince insisted on doing the right thing and married me. He got a job as a roofer during the day and worked in a saddlemaker’s shop at night. I hardly saw him. I was pretty sick throughout my pregnancy. I worked at Thelma’s Dress Shop. When I couldn’t be on the sales floor, I helped her with bookkeeping.”

“Thelma’s? Over on Tumbleweed? It’s been there that long?” Emily asked.

Francesca answered her. “Thelma’s daughter runs it now. But Thelma still comes in a few days a week.”

“Go on,” Emily encouraged Tessa. “I didn’t mean to interrupt.”

“Sometimes I forget you haven’t lived here all your life,” Tessa admitted. She was actually glad for Emily’s interruption because what came next was the difficult part.

Francesca reached across the table and patted Tessa’s hand. “It might be good to talk about it. You never do.”

No, she never did…because she just wanted to forget. “I was twenty-six weeks pregnant when I went into labor. I had a placenta accreta. The placenta pulled a hole in my uterus and I hemorrhaged. We lost the baby and I had to have a hysterectomy.”

Emily went very quiet. She brought her hands together in her lap, looked down at them and then returned her gaze to Tessa’s. “I’m so very sorry, Tessa. That would be devastating for any woman. As a teenager, I can’t even imagine what that did to you.”

“When my father heard what happened, he blamed Vince and the life we were living. We had a walk-up apartment and the bare necessities. Everything we earned went for expenses and the baby. The night I went into labor, I collapsed and couldn’t get to the phone. Our landlady found me and called the ambulance. I needed Vince but he wasn’t there…he was working. When I was released, I made the choice to go home with Dad rather than back to our apartment. I didn’t want to be a burden on Vince. I didn’t know if he married me because he had to, or because he thought we were meant to be together, like I did.”

She stopped to take a much-needed pause, then went on. “Vince…Vince came to my dad’s. He told me the pregnancy and our marriage was a mistake, that we’d been too young. He knew I wanted to be a doctor and he said that’s what I should be. He was going to join the Air Force, maybe make a career of it like his uncle had. His uncle was very different from his dad. His dad drank and couldn’t hold a job, and I think Vince just needed to prove he was different, that he could succeed at something. He didn’t ask me what I wanted. I could see he wasn’t willing to fight for what we had.”

“You were both grieving. You’d lost a child,” Emily sympathized.

“A baby boy,” Tessa murmured, her own voice catching. Then she regained her composure. “I know now no one should make major decisions about their life under those circumstances. But we did. He left, and I went to Stanford. Less than a year later I heard he was seeing someone. So I knew our relationship hadn’t meant as much to him as it had to me. Even though we’d broken up, even though we’d gotten a divorce, I still felt betrayed.”

“So what happened today?” Francesca prompted. “Why was he at your office? He’s moved back and he has children?”

“I can’t say. You know that. If you find out about Vince from someone else, that’s fine. But I can’t tell you anything more.”

Francesca and Emily exchanged another of those looks, and Tessa knew what that meant. Sagebrush was a small town. They’d soon know exactly why Vincent Rossi had returned.

The waitress appeared, carrying a tray with their lunches. Tessa had no appetite whatsoever. However, she was determined that Vince Rossi’s return would not affect her life. He would not turn her world upside down a second time.

Vince entered Sagebrush High School ten days later, cell phone to his ear. “Is everything okay?” he asked the woman he’d hired to take care of Sean.

“Just fine, Mr. Rossi. Sean ate all of his supper. I’m going to give him a bath and put him to bed. Or do you want me to keep him up until you come home?”

Vince had interviewed three women to watch Sean during his working hours. He’d liked Mrs. Zappa the best. She was a widow, a retired teacher who was available whenever he might need her and she loved kids. Almost everyone in town knew her and they’d all given her good references. So he shouldn’t worry when he was away from Sean. But he’d been caring for the little boy day and night, all by himself, since the beginning of March. It was hard to let go.

“No, don’t keep him up,” he directed her. “He’ll just get cranky. If he wakes up later, I’ll read him a story and then put him down again. I should be home by nine…ten at the latest. The parent meeting will probably last about a half hour, and then there will be questions and answers afterward.”

He knew Tessa was going to be at the meeting, too. At least this time he’d be prepared to see her. This time he was ready.

That’s what he told himself.

Until he walked into the principal’s office and saw her. She was standing at the counter where visitors signed in and out, where students made their needs and wants known. She was wearing a raspberry-colored suit with a cream blouse and looked like ten million bucks.

She must have heard him come in because she turned, and their gazes collided. “Vince,” she said in acknowledgment, her soft voice running up his spine like a sensual finger. “I thought you might send one of your officers to take care of this.”

Maybe she was hoping he’d send one of his officers to speak. Then she wouldn’t have to see him. “I thought tonight was too important to skip. I don’t think parents realize exactly what dangers crop up around the prom and the summer holidays. They need to know what to do to talk to their kids and protect them.”

Tessa gave him a long, studying assessment. “I agree. The principal said you were going to talk first. Do you have a prepared presentation?”

He grinned at her. “Nope. I’m going to wing it.” Then he shrugged. “I’ve done this before about a thousand times. It’s all in my head.”

She lifted her zippered portfolio. “It’s all in my notes.”

He laughed. That was Tessa, always organized and prepared. He took a few steps closer to her and his laugh faded. “Are you going to cover alcohol and drugs?”

She didn’t step back, just nodded.

Her blond brows were so delicately shaped. Her fringe of lashes was darker than her hair. Her blue eyes had always been guileless. He could smell vanilla and strawberries again, and he saw the pulse at her neck beating.

“Are you nervous about this?” he asked.

“The presentation? Or giving the presentation with you?”

“Either. Both.”

“I’m not seventeen anymore. I don’t get nervous as easily.”

The bravado was new, as was her confidence level. But so much was the same.

He gently placed a finger on the pulse point of her neck and could feel exactly how fast her heart was beating. “You’re nervous about something,” he insisted.

She could have slapped his hand away, which was sort of what he expected. She definitely could have backed away. But she just stood there, gazing into his eyes, and he realized that was worse than shutting him out.

Because he saw the pain he’d caused Tessa…and now he knew she’d never forgive him.

Chapter Two

“I see the two of you have met,” said Joe Mercer, the principal of Sagebrush High School, to Tessa and Vince as he exited his private office.

Tessa didn’t speak. She still felt breathless and disconcerted from Vince’s touch.

“We went to school here together,” Vince filled in when the silence grew awkward.

Joe, a handsome man in his midforties and prematurely gray, asked Tessa, “Is the school the same as you remembered it?”

Walking into Sagebrush High brought back too many memories as far as she was concerned. Although she’d convinced her father to let her attend the public high school, she’d felt alone and very much the outsider here—until Vince had dropped into her life. “It’s the same. Though the halls have a new coat of paint and the auditorium was added on since I…we…came to school here.”

As she glanced at Vince, she saw his eyes had turned a stormy gray. Was he remembering the kisses they’d shared behind locker doors? The quick hugs before a test? The afterschool rendezvous in his pickup truck in the parking lot? She might not want those memories to still be intact, but in spite of her best effort to tame or banish them, they were. The deepening of lines on Vince’s brow told her he couldn’t banish them, either.

She purposefully glanced at her watch. “I suppose the parents will be gathering. Are we speaking to them in the auditorium?”

“Unfortunately we won’t have enough parents here to need the auditorium,” Joe replied. “They think they know their kids so most don’t attend these meetings. We’re gathering in the library.”

As the principal motioned for Tessa to precede him into the hall, Vince asked him, “You publicized this?”

“Absolutely. Flyers went home with the kids. We posted it on our Web site. There was even a notice in the paper.”

Vince had come up beside Tessa, his long-legged stride easily taking him ahead of her. When he realized it, he slowed.

Just looking at him could still make her giddy. At eighteen, he’d been most girls’ fantasy date, with his good looks, sexy beard stubble and broad shoulders that could make a girl feel safe. At thirty-eight, he was so much more. The lines etched around his eyes had come from maturity and experience. She guessed his strong jaw still carried a shadowed beard line after five o’clock. But tonight he was clean-shaven, ready for his part of the program.

She tried not to look too hard or see too much, but in spite of herself, she noticed that tonight he wore a denim blazer, white oxford shirt and black jeans, a broad-rimmed cowboy hat low over his eyes. He’d obviously kept in shape. She’d been able to tell that from the muscles evident under his polo shirt that day in her office. She’d tried to ignore the changes in his body as he’d handed Sean to her…as he’d loomed in the room while she’d examined his son.

His son.

“How is Sean adjusting to the move?” she asked, as their footsteps echoed in the hall and they drew closer to the library.

“Probably better than I am,” Vince admitted with a rueful smile.

She’d be safer not commenting on Vince’s adjustment. “If Sean’s sleeping, eating well and seems happy, then he’s adjusting.”

“Sometimes he wakes up around 2:00 a.m. and wants to play. I walk him for a while and talk to him, then he settles down again.”

She didn’t know why she was having such a difficult time imagining Vince with the baby, accepting full care of him. Maybe because while she was pregnant he simply hadn’t been around much and she’d wished he had been.

As they entered the library, Tessa noticed that most of the rectangular tables for eight were filled, and about a hundred parents had gathered.

Joe led them to the circulation desk. A podium was positioned in front of it with two chairs by its side.

“I didn’t want this to be too formal,” he told them in a low voice. “If we can keep the meeting more conversational, give parents a chance to ask questions and not feel a barrier between you and them, that would be best. Chief Rossi, after my opening remarks I’ll introduce you. Is there anything I need to set up for you? A bit of a background?”

“I’ll include my background when I talk to them,” Vince assured the principal.

“The same for you, Dr. McGuire?” Joe asked.

She nodded, eager to hear what Vince had to say. In spite of herself she was curious about where he’d been and what he’d done over the past twenty years. Not that he would go into all of that publicly. But she might get a hint.

She was always all nerves before she gave a presentation. She was much better one-on-one, or in a small group. But she did it as a challenge, as she did everything. If she was afraid of something, she knew she had to walk straight toward it and face it. Was that how Vince ran his life, too?

She sensed a confidence about him that had been lacking when he was a teenager. At eighteen he’d stood tall and said what he thought more because of defiance than confidence.

Now, however, he walked up to the podium and gave the group a relaxed smile. After he swiped off his Stetson, he laid it on the counter behind him and ran a hand through his thick black hair.

“I’m Vince Rossi, chief of police of the Sagebrush P.D.” He nodded to the group. “It’s good to see all of you here. I know you’re wondering what I can tell you about your sons and daughters. Maybe nothing. Maybe something. Maybe my experience in law enforcement will tell you the pitfalls available to teenagers in a small town, especially when drugs, alcohol and vehicles are involved. If you listen to what I have to say, I promise to answer each and every one of your questions, even if I’m here all night.”

Whether Vince had had psychological training in the method he used to approach the group, Tessa didn’t know. But what he’d said had worked. All gazes were on him. They were attentive, thanks to the promise of individual attention if they needed it. Vince already held them in the palm of his hand.

Unbidden, she thought about his palm. How it had touched her in pleasure and gentleness and teasing. Taking a deep breath, she looked down at the portfolio on her lap rather than at Vince. She’d be better off concentrating on his words than on him.

Tessa’s approach, when it was her turn, was altogether different from Vince’s. She spoke as a friend of the family, warning of signs of changes in their children’s personalities, explaining that no child was immune from peer pressure and the need for friends’ approval. After she finished, she assured them she’d also be available to speak to any parent who had concerns.

During the next hour both she and Vince answered questions, gave advice, but mostly listened.

When only a dozen or so parents remained, talking among themselves in small groups, Vince crossed to her. “I’m going to have to face their concerns in another thirteen or fourteen years.” He shook his head. “That makes me want to bury my head in the sand.”

When they’d separated, Vince had buried his head in the sand where she was concerned…where their marriage was concerned. He hadn’t wanted to see how much she loved him…how much she wanted their marriage to work…how sad she was because of the loss of their child. It had been easier for him to walk away.

All these years she’d put the past in a compartment that she’d shut tight. She couldn’t seem to do that tonight, but she was giving it her best shot. She reminded herself just to treat this evening as a professional, not as Vince’s ex-wife. “Drugs and alcohol don’t have to be a rite of passage.”

After their gazes met for a few long moments, Vince remarked, “It’s a shame you’re a pediatrician.”

“Why?”

“Because these parents would all put their kids in your care if you didn’t just treat babies. How long have you been back here?”

“Two years. Since Family Tree opened.”

Suddenly, one of the men who appeared to be a few years older than Vince broke away from another couple and approached Tessa. “Dr. McGuire, I’m Tim Daltry. I know your dad pretty well. He’s letting my son, Ray, work at the ranch after school and weekends to make money for college. Just wanted to let you know how grateful I am for that. He’s paying Ray real good and it’s going to make a difference.”

Tessa had always admired her father’s generosity. He wasn’t public about it, but he did things like this when he could. “If Dad hired your son, I’m sure Ray’s giving him a good day’s work for what he’s getting.”

Always aware of Vince even when she didn’t want to be, she noticed his mouth had gone tight at the mention of her father. She wondered just how deep his resentment ran. She’d had to let go of hers. Everything her father had done had stemmed from his love for her. And although at the time she hadn’t agreed with any of it, her father in essence had proved himself right—because Vince had left. He’d abandoned her to find a life that suited him better.

“Well, I just wanted to introduce myself,” Daltry said. “Give your dad my regards.” His gaze went to Vince. “You gave us a lot to think about. I can’t quite see Chief Farmer ever speaking to a group like this.”

“I wouldn’t know,” Vince replied casually. “But Chief Farmer is planning to come back as soon as he’s recovered. If you want to do more programs like this, you could make the suggestion.”

“Maybe I will. Rumor has it you were a homicide detective in Albuquerque. Is that true?”

“Sure is.”

“What made you come to a town like Sagebrush?”

Tessa could see Daltry was wondering if Vince had gotten into trouble somehow, or been demoted, or been kicked off the force. Everyone liked meaty gossip. She and Vince had been the butt of it twenty years ago. But that had been a long time ago. Some people might remember, others might not. Since she’d returned to Sagebrush, residents here had respected her privacy. But now that Vince was back…

To her surprise, Vince didn’t clam up but was completely forthright with Daltry. “My life changed. I’m a father now, and a homicide detective’s life wasn’t conducive to bringing up a child.”

“But if you’re only here for a few months…” Daltry trailed off.

“I’m just concentrating on what I have to do here, then I’ll look past that.”

It was a smooth answer and one that didn’t tell Tessa anything. Would Vince consider staying in the area? Would he go back to Albuquerque or on to somewhere new? She could easily see that happening.

Mr. Daltry bid them both good-night and followed a few other parents out of the library.

Vince looked over at the principal, who was talking to one lingering parent. Then he checked his watch. “I know it’s getting late and we’ll both be up early, but how would you like to grab a cup of coffee at the diner?”

She couldn’t read his expression or tell anything from his eyes, so she decided to just honestly ask, “Why?”

After studying her for a long moment, he replied, “Because there’s ice between us and I’d like to chip at it a little.”

He was right. She’d thought she’d put the past in the past. But seeing Vince again stirred up old feelings—feelings she’d thought she’d dealt with, feelings that had no place in her life now. If he was going to be in Sagebrush and she was going to run into him, she didn’t want those feelings disrupting her existence. Sure, she had walls up. She’d admit that. But a tête-à-tête with Vince? Sitting across the table from him, gazing into those steel-gray eyes…

Would that make matters better or worse?

For better or worse, for richer or poorer…

Those vows had meant nothing to him. But she didn’t want to hate him. She didn’t want to resent him. She didn’t want to be bitter about what had happened back then. She didn’t want a squall of memories to assault her just from standing close to him.

Closure was what she needed. Facing what she didn’t want to face might do the trick.

“I have time for a cup of…tea,” she substituted. They both used to like rich, dark coffee—decaf for her after she was pregnant—no sugar, no cream. Especially in the morning after making love…

She had shut down memories for years. But tonight she might have to let them rise to the surface so she could move on…so she could prove to herself she was over Vince Rossi for good.

The end-of-May night was wonderfully clear with a bright half-moon and thousands of stars twinkling as Tessa walked beside Vince to the diner. So many stars, so many wishes. She’d stopped wishing on stars when she was eighteen and her dreams had crashed.

Awkward silence wrapped around them with neither of them knowing what to say.

“So much for ice breaking,” Vince said wryly as they approached the diner with its flashing neon sign announcing to the world that the Yellow Rose Diner was open.

“We used to know each other, Vince. We don’t anymore. That’s why it’s hard to talk.”

He stopped before the glass door and didn’t attempt to pull it open. “Are you telling me a former homicide detective and a doctor have nothing in common? We’re people, Tessa. If you pretend I’m a stranger you met at a party, I’ll bet then you’d have something to say.”

“Meaning?” She could feel herself bristling and knew they were off to a difficult start.

Vince blew out a breath. “Meaning you handled that crowd—most of them strangers—tonight like a pro. You didn’t have difficulty speaking to anyone who approached you. So why is it so hard to have a conversation with me?”

There were a thousand answers in her head, beginning with because you left, because you abandoned me, because you didn’t stand up to my father, because you thought I wasn’t worth a fight. But silence seemed to be her best recourse and she stuck to it.

If he’d continued to challenge her, they might have walked away from each other right then and there. But instead of being oppositional, he murmured gently, “Tessa.”

The sound of her name in just that way twisted her heart. She confided, “I guess maybe there’s too much to say and I’m afraid the wrong thing will spill out. I don’t want to say anything I’ll regret. And let’s face it, we never just talked about the weather.”

Now when she gazed into his eyes, his were conflicted with memories of everything they’d shared years ago—from dreams and plans to marriage and hopes for their baby.

Breaking eye contact, he opened the door to the diner.

The restaurant was empty but Tessa recognized the waitress wiping down the red counter. “Hi, Mindy.”

“Dr. McGuire! I haven’t seen you for a while.” She cast an assessing glance at Vince, then screwed up her face into an I-think-I-know-you look. “Aren’t you the new chief of police? Rossi, isn’t it? Aren’t you originally from Sagebrush?” She glanced quickly at Tessa and Tessa wondered if Mindy knew their story. But Mindy went on, addressing Vince again. “Dusty was telling me the guys were all nervous when they heard you were coming back, being a homicide detective and all. But he said you weren’t trying to make a whole bunch of changes and you seemed like a right nice guy.”

Vince’s complexion grew a little ruddier. Instead of commenting on what the waitress had said, he motioned to the glass-covered cake dish with its three doughnuts. “So this is where Dusty buys the doughnuts. They’re always gone ten minutes after he brings them in.”

Mindy smiled. “We’ve got the best baked goods in town. I’ve got half an apple pie left and you and Doc McGuire deserve a piece.”

She whispered in an aside to Vince, throwing her chin at Tessa, “The doc gives me samples for my boy when he’s sick, so I can stretch my tips a little further.” Motioning to the table back in the corner, she suggested, “If you two want some privacy, you can have the best table in the house. Tea for you, Doc?”

Tessa nodded.

“Black coffee for you, Chief?”

“How did you know?”

“Just a guess. You look like the type. Just made a new pot.”

Vince waited until Tessa was seated, then pulled out his own chair. After he sat across from her, he shook his head ruefully. “I’d forgotten everyone in this town knows everything about everyone else.”

“You’re a public figure.”

“Not for long.”

He was leaving. She had to remember that.

Swiping off his Stetson, he settled it on one of the chairs. “When I brought Sean in to see you, I forgot to ask for a recommendation for a physical therapist. It’s another two weeks until we see Dr. Rafferty and I want to make sure the exercises I’m doing with him are enough.”

“Unfortunately there aren’t any physical therapy practices in Sagebrush. You’ll have to go to Lubbock.”

“I’ll go wherever I need to go.”

She saw that he would. “I know several good therapists, but let me ask around and I’ll find out who’s best with a child Sean’s age.”

“I’d appreciate that.”

Mindy brought their drinks and pie.

Tessa picked up her fork and took a bite, rolling her eyes in obvious pleasure. “This makes up for not eating supper.”

“Did you work late?”

“I always work late. It depends on how long rounds at the hospital take, if I have an emergency, if there’s a problem patient who runs overtime. There are never enough hours in a day.”

They ate in silence for a few moments until Vince asked, “So your dad still raises cutting horses?”

She hadn’t expected the subject of her father to come up again so soon. “He does. He has a manager and a trainer, so he doesn’t do as much of the training as he used to. But he pushes himself to stay moving so his arthritis doesn’t get the best of him.” She took another bite of her pie, though her stomach was churning. “But that isn’t really what you wanted to know, is it? If you want to ask me about him, go ahead.”

He eyed her assessingly. “Does he still control your life?”

Was that what Vince had always thought?

He’d never really understood her relationship with her father. But she wasn’t going to be able to explain it to him over a ten-minute cup of tea. He’d never gotten to know her dad and that had always been part of the problem.

Her father had been protective of her when she was a teenager, afraid Vince would ruin her life. That’s why he’d been opposed to them dating. When they’d married, he’d disowned her, hoping that would bring her to her senses. Instead she’d held on to Vince and the life they could have. Until she’d lost the baby.

A protective urge rose up in her—the urge to protect her dad and to protect herself. It was close to anger, close to rebelliousness, close to all the words she’d never been able to say to Vince because he’d left and hadn’t wanted to hear them. “You said you wanted to chip at the ice walls between us. I don’t think this is the way to do it.”

He leaned away from the table in obvious frustration. “I don’t know how else to say it, Tessa.”

She saw he was being sincere. She matched that sincerity with the truth. “My dad and I are close, but we have separate lives. He respects the decisions I make.”

“Did he ask you to come back to Sagebrush?”

She’d never had a short fuse. In fact, she’d always thought she’d been blessed with an overabundance of the gift of patience. But Vince had always made her question herself and her feelings, what she thought and what she believed. She reacted more strongly whenever she was around him, to him and to everyone else.

She tried to keep her voice steady. “Actually, he didn’t want me to come home. He didn’t think that was good for my career. But he got tossed by a two-year-old horse he was trying to gentle and broke his arm. He could manage. He had help. But when I came home to visit, I could see how he was slowing down. I’d been so focused on med school and residency, my visits had been brief. I took a good look at my life in California and didn’t feel particularly attached. When I heard about the Family Tree Health Center opening, I decided to take the opportunity to come back. Does that answer your question?”

“Not exactly.”

She laid her fork down, most of her pie uneaten. “Well, it’s going to have to do.” She picked up her purse and portfolio. “I’d better be going.”

Vince stood, too.

“You can finish.”

“I’m not letting you walk back to your car alone.”

“This is Sagebrush, Vince.”

“Yes, and I’m the chief of police. I know what goes on here.” He took some bills from his wallet and laid them on the table.

She was going to protest, say she’d pay her half, but the look on his face told her just to head for the door. After a wave at Mindy, she pushed outside. A second later Vince was beside her, silent, not brooding, but definitely pensive.

After half a block he asked, “Did you miss anything about Sagebrush when you were gone?”

A glance at him told her that was a serious question. “I missed the ranch—the horses and cats, and particularly the smells. You know, old wood, saddle leather, sage, brush, the sun heating the damp grass. Mostly I missed riding.”

“You couldn’t find a stable in California?”

“Oh, sure. I went riding a few times. But it wasn’t the same and I simply didn’t have the time. After my shifts, I was dead on my feet. I snatched sleep when I could, studied, and didn’t have much of a life outside of work.”

“Were you in a pediatrics practice out there?”

“After my residency. I also volunteered at a free clinic. But I knew I’d burn out if I kept working at that pace.”

They walked another half block without speaking. Tessa, curious about the path Vince had taken, asked, “Did your law enforcement interest begin in the service?”

“I was stationed at Kirkland Air Force Base in Albuquerque all four years because I was in law enforcement.”

“But why the interest in the first place?”

There was a very long pause before Vince answered, “You knew my mother left. What you didn’t know was that she was murdered.”

Tessa stopped walking and turned to him, her hand on his arm. “Vince. I’m so sorry. You never said anything—”

“It wasn’t something I wanted to remember or talk about. Still don’t, really. She left me and my dad, went to New Orleans and was murdered by a lover. That’s the long and short of it. So I guess I felt I was doing something to right what had gone wrong. That’s not rational of course, but it led me where I am.”

She could feel his taut muscles under his blazer. In the glow of the streetlamp, she could see a beard shadow darkening his jaw. What she couldn’t see was the expression in his eyes under the brim of the Stetson that shadowed them. Even so, due to her imagination or not, she could feel heat emanating from him, rising up from her, and currents rushing from her body into his and back again. She let go of his arm.

They began walking again and soon reached the school’s parking lot where their cars were the only two left. His was a silver SUV. Hers was a small blue sedan. They were both in the front line of the lot about ten spaces apart.

He kept pace with her as she walked toward her car.

“I’m fine now,” she assured him. “You can keep me in your sight as I get in and drive away.”

“I will.”

When he clasped her shoulder, she felt…fire. A rush of memories overwhelmed her. She would have backed away from them if she could have and from him. But his magnetic pull was too great to break.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, though she suspected he knew.

“We’re not strangers,” she murmured, knowing that definitely wasn’t the answer to his question.

“No, we’re not. And even if we wanted to be, that wouldn’t change what we were to each other.”

What were we? a little voice inside her head screamed. Yet, no matter what his answer was, it was too late. They were over. They’d been over for a long time.

“You look scared.” Vince’s hand moved from her shoulder and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “Do I still have the power to move you?”

Now she did force herself to back away from his touch…forced herself to remember the sadness, the grief and the loss. “It would be foolish of me to answer that question.”

Yet she knew by saying it, she already had.

Her keys in hand, she hurriedly pressed the remote and the car beeped at her. She opened the driver’s door, slipped inside and quickly shut it. She didn’t roll down her window. Maybe she was being a coward, but she didn’t want to hear anything else Vince might have to say. She certainly didn’t want him to touch her again because he did still move her and she couldn’t accept that. She wouldn’t accept that.

He stood there watching her as she backed up and drove faster than she should have out of the parking lot. She didn’t glance into her rearview mirror.

She wouldn’t look back again tonight. She absolutely wouldn’t.