From the city of angels to the land of fire. Danny Beer, gringo on tour

Mitla.: Need a good rim job
Monday September 17, 2007, 48 km (30 miles) – Total so far: 4,045 km (2,513 miles)

Oaxaca city is nice. Saturday day is wasted wandering about the market trying to find a bike shop for some new rims. All without success. You head out Saturday night with a couple of new friends. It is independence day and there’s a big fiesta in town. It’s a fun, hazy night.

On Sunday everything is free. You take the bus to Monte Alban which is nice and then visit Santo Demengo Cathedral, monastery and museum. You also meet Jacob, another cyclist who started in Alaska.

Monday morning you visit another bike shop to try to sort out those rims. Bike shops here sell. They don’t service. So what you need to do is buy the rims at one place and take them to another place to put them on. It sounds a bit complicated, even more so by your lack of Spanish, and more so again because what you want nobody has. Your wheels take 32 spokes and the only rims which cost less than your entire bike all take 36 spokes. So you need to replace some other things too to fit it all on. But nobody sells that and it is all very confusing and you still don’t get anything done. Perhaps the next town.

You ride to Mitla where some more ruins lie. There is a bike path leading out of town and then a nice wide shoulder almost all the way there. The ruins close by the time you get there so you will just have to wait until tomorrow. There’s not much to do in town.

San Jose.: Some great descents
Tuesday September 18, 2007, 98 km (61 miles) – Total so far: 4,143 km (2,574 miles)

I hope you fancy big long hills today cause that’s what you’re going to get. But don’t worry as there are more descents than ascents. A twenty km detour up the autopiste doesn’t help matters. Someone tells you to go back and get on the highway.

You already started the day late with a visit to the ruins at Mitla. They are okay by the way. Not very extensive or anything but nice to see if you are in town anyway. There’s an uphill section on the highway followed by twenty km of straight downhill. Someone painted ‘cyclists returno’ with a returning arrow on the road before the downhill. Cacti is in abundance out here. Head and side winds dog your day slowing you down even further.

Then get ready for the ascent again. You leave Sofia behind only to find her much later in San Jose where a hotel is found. As you head up the mountains the view to the south is nice. Glad you’re not heading that way then. Looks hard. And back down again. You find a town just before dusk. A hotel is found if you ask politely. Time for dinner. And much relaxation.

To Jalapa.: Pitching the tent on the roof
Wednesday September 19, 2007, 112 km (70 miles) – Total so far: 4,255 km (2,644 miles)

Some more mountains await your day. You make it to El Cameron by twelve and from there it is one long stretch up followed by another down. El Cameron has a hotel. The next hotel is 88 km further at Jalapa. There are places to eat in between but not much else but ascents, descents, and quite a nice view.

You leave Sofia far behind. A driver says she has wheel problems a long, long way away up the mountain. The kilometers drop one by one until Jalapa where you agreed to meet Sofia. There is one hotel in town. It’s expensive. You ask for another and are directed to a rooftop which looks nice for pitching the tent. Best to wait for Sofia first though.

Niltepec.: Nowhere to eat in town
Thursday September 20, 2007, 126 km (78 miles) – Total so far: 4,381 km (2,722 miles)

You pack up and find a restaurant on the main road for breakfast. Still no sign of Sofia. For once you are able to enjoy something of a tailwind. But before you reach Tehuantepic a freeway presents itself and you take it. This is a mistake. What was once a tailwind becomes a headwind. After thirty km of this the road veers around and the wind is more of a benefit again.

At one point the freeway stops for construction and you need to make a short detour on a smaller road without shoulders and more traffic. You have a strong crosswind to deal with now. This is certainly no fun with big trucks wanting to overtake at inopportune moments. Back on the freeway again you are less concerned with mentally writing your will.

You ask someone how far to a hotel. Five km. Excellent. Bullshit. It’s ten. The nice smooth freeway becomes a narrow shitty road. You arrive in Niltepec. There are two hotels in town. One is overpriced and you can’t find anyone to service the other one. But a wander about reveals the owner and you walk back with him to check in. It is the one year anniversary of his mother’s death so everyone is out celebrating. He’s a bit drunk and needs to piss. He does so while walking along, pissing out in front without conviction.

It’s a nice hotel. You find some interesting food to eat and wash it down with a couple beers. Sofia is now 100 km behind you. Looks like you’ll need a couple rest days to let her catch up. But not here. Best to leave this half town to the dogs.

Tapanatepec.: Good roads and tough wind
Friday September 21, 2007, 57 km (35 miles) – Total so far: 4,438 km (2,758 miles)

Just a short ride today. Sofia has to catch up somehow and if you keep going at your pace she never will. There is a town, Tapanatepec, just before the long hard slog up the mountain. It looks like as good a place as any to await Sofia for the climb ahead.

The day is hot and the road is crap. It sure is a day of road works. After six km the road widens to the lovable freeway once again but alas it is short lived as all too soon road works hinder the ride. Some minor issues with traffic but this has all become second nature by now. Truck driver seems to be a synonym for arsehole.

There are a couple hotels on route. After a bite to eat you really do feel like moving on. The town is as dead as the last and it would be nice to be somewhere more lively for the weekend. It is only three but you go back to the posada and check in. Good thing too as the heavens soon open up in a torrential downpour.

The plan now, if you can communicate this to Sofia, is to lie in tomorrow morning and hopefully meet up here for lunch. Then together you can ride another thirty or fifty km depending. Maybe.

Up and up and up.: Spanish or no Spanish you still get the same lack of answers
Saturday September 22, 2007, 45 km (28 miles) – Total so far: 4,483 km (2,786 miles)

You meet up with Sofia at the Posada at around twelve. After lunch it is all uphill. A guy stops and gives you some local food to eat. He seems to be praying for you. You probably need it.

Some guy wants you to stop and chat. He wants to take you to the lagoon but you insist on cycling. “Is it uphill’ you ask. Lots of curves is all you are able to get. Sofia catches up with you as you grab a bite to eat. She asks herself about ascents and with all her Spanish is only able to find out the same. Lots of curves. But what does that mean? Uphill curves or downhill ones?

Just after a town after 36 km of mostly uphill cycling you find a hospedaje. But the lagoon just ahead is apparently mui bonita so you detour another four km there to find out for yourself. It’s nice but there’s nowhere to really stay and now you need to cycle four km uphill to get back to the hospedaje.

On the way back you find a bee somewhere in your shirt. Some frantic moments a spent veering all over the road as you try to get it out.

To Tuxtla.: Bad bus driver. Naughty, naughty, naughty
Sunday September 23, 2007, 126 km (78 miles) – Total so far: 4,609 km (2,864 miles)

Is it just you or is the traffic today noticeably more aggressive? You leave Sofia at the hotel and continue on. Apparently there is a lot of uphill ahead and she would rather take the bus from the next town. There are a couple of ascents but nothing longer than six or seven kilometers. Cintalapa and Ocozocoautla are both decent sized towns with a few accommodations options in each. You stop at a campsite/restaurant with a pool just before Cintalapa. Three teenage boys approach as you near the restaurant. They aren’t intimidating but their idiotic attitude loses the place business. Why would you want to eat at a place with three guys staring at you at laughing about English. They’re probably trying to be helpful. But you don’t need nor want them around. You leave and eat elsewhere.

You get to Ocozocoautla, the day’s destination and are lured in by some hotcakes. With three more hours of daylight left you should be able to make the 36 km to Tuxla. Only six km of it is uphill apparently. It’s the first six. You come to a crossroads. There aren’t any signs so you ask a guy for directions. He is able to point in 180 degrees at once. You cross the road and ask some women but they keep walking before you can get an answer. Fortunately there is a sign across the road so you go there to get your information.

From here a nice wide shoulder is available all the way in to Tuxla. A truck and then a bus prefer to drive on the shoulder rather than their lane, passing way too close. The bus is particularly bad as it overtakes as you fly downhill giving you a long moment of uncertain exhilaration. Do bus drivers do this on purpose?

San Christobel.: All uphill
Tuesday September 25, 2007, 69 km (43 miles) – Total so far: 4,678 km (2,907 miles)

The first ten km out of Tuxla is pretty much downhill. Your front gears have broken so you detour off the main artery to find a bike shop. Easily fixed if you know what you are doing. Hell if you don’t.

Back on the freeway it is forty km straight up to San Christobel. Up and up you go. It rains. You get wet. Traffic often use the shoulder as an extra lane. A few cars pass marginally close leaving you cursing behind. Eventually your legs give out and you can no longer ride the ascent. You walk.

You reach the summit, cold and wet. Changing gears you almost ride straight into a great big hole built into the shoulder. The same shoulder you are riding on. More of these holes appear as you ride the last few km downhill and into town. It is right on dark and you have no more energy left.

But where exactly is the town? You ask directions a few times and find your way to the hostel. A hot shower and a few cold beers make a nice evening in.

Comitan.: Nice ride down
Friday September 28, 2007, 92 km (57 miles) – Total so far: 4,770 km (2,964 miles)

You spend three days in San Christobel. The first is spent at a nearby Zapata village. It is interesting in a way with the rebels. The ride to and fro isn’t so nice making you feel really sick. The second day is spent going to the ruins of Palenque. The ruins are nice but the bus ride there, including a six AM start. On the third day you find a bike shop and finally sort out your rims. About time too. In order to fit it all on they have to put new rear gears on. So now you have six rear gears instead of eight.

You don’t leave San Christobel until late. You feel sick for most of the ride to Comitan. There are two significant descents with a nice long ascent in between. After the first descent you find a town. You hope for a restaurant soon after but none are to be found for another fifty km and you don’t eat at all until dinner.

On the ascent dark clouds turn to rain. It passes before the pass and the day turns sunny once more. Comitan is a nice town. You find Sofia, get some food and look for a place to stay.

To Guatemala.: Dodgy border town
Saturday September 29, 2007, 89 km (55 miles) – Total so far: 4,859 km (3,019 miles)

It is a nice mostly downhill day. You make the same mistake as yesterday with lunch. For forty km there is pretty much nothing to eat. You stop at one place but their dog tries to bite your fingers off. Time to move on. You stop for a hamburgesa and wait for Sofia to catch up.

As soon as you get over one illness you get another. You never felt okay in San Christobel. And now after only being better for a couple days you are sick again. It must have been that hamburger you ate.

The last four km to the Guatemalan border are painful. You know you are close when rubbish is littered about. After border formalities you cross over. Well, under the barrier technically. It is on dark. This is a rugged border town. Sofia wants to find a hotel and lock the door. You find a nice hotel and book in. The price is about twenty US when Sofia asks but when you return soon after the price is higher. So send Sofia back in to sort it out.

Welcome to Guatemala.

To a town.: It has a name, maybe
Sunday September 30, 2007, 51 km (32 miles) – Total so far: 4,910 km (3,051 miles)

You awake late, finally hauling yourself out of bed to get breakfast. But back in the room a movie on TV seems so much easier than the ascent ahead. You feel weak. You feel sick. The climb is draining on your legs.

Guatemala is a little like Mexico but rougher around the edges. The people look poorer but culturally richer. Lot’s of holas and bye byes. There are a couple nice descents early on but after that the road just climbs. It’s not steep but together with you being ill and all it’s not nice.

There is a hotel ten km further on. Except there isn’t one. Seven km. One km. Three km. And a hotel. It rains hard. That’s enough for one day. Sure, you didn’t break any records but enough is enough. Besides, it’s dark and apparently a bit dangerous around here.

Huahuatenengo.: The world of Maya
Monday October 1, 2007, 39 km (24 miles) – Total so far: 4,949 km (3,075 miles)

The road continues climbing. You still feel sick but by dinner feel somewhat better. An easy day really today. Sofia begins a good start to the day by locking herself in the toilet at the restaurant. Perhaps you should have realized sooner if only you weren’t so busy chatting to the kids. Some more nice scenery and lots of Maya present the day. A few people shout out gringo at you and Sofia gets a few suggestive remarks but nothing too serious. You head into Huahuatenengo and find the city centre. A hot shower and hot food sure are good. Tomorrow may be a long day so best rest up.

Up the road.: Camping behind a church
Tuesday October 2, 2007, 46 km (29 miles) – Total so far: 4,995 km (3,104 miles)

You awake late once again meaning that today is another short day on the bikes. And it is mostly uphill. Nobody around here says hello or hola. It is always bye bye or adios. It’s not unfriendly or anything. That’s just how the locals do it.

With about an hour of daylight left you are reduced to walking your bike. Theoretically a hotel exists just ten km further. But Guatemalans, like their Mexican counterparts, have no concept of distance.

You spot a church and on Sofia’s insistence camp behind there for the night. You try to find the pastor to ask but he’s not about. There is a shop nearby. They close at six-thirty. But when you return to buy some things they have already closed. Two more shops exist further up and you can buy some junk food there. Of your three nights so far in Guatemala, you have had two cheetos dinners

Xela.: Bad, bad truck driver
Wednesday October 3, 2007, 48 km (30 miles) – Total so far: 5,043 km (3,134 miles)

It is another fourteen km to the promised hotel. Uphill. Traffic is unfriendly today. From unfriendly it becomes hellish. The same truck almost hits both you and Sofia. With fourteen km to go you turn off to Xela, (Quentanengo). The town looks nice. Just need to go out and see it.

Nahuala.: An interesting little Mayan town
Thursday October 4, 2007, 46 km (29 miles) – Total so far: 5,089 km (3,162 miles)

Traffic today is murderous. Those chicken buses must get to where ever it is they go as fast as possible and no cyclist is going to slow them down. Two trucks run you off the road early on. There are a few sections of roadwork in place. This congests the traffic all together to try to overtake you all at once in a dense cloud of smoke while at other times the road is positively empty.

After fourteen km you get back on the InterAmericana. Then it is a mostly uphill twenty km before another ten km straight back down again. You miss the turnoff to the town of Nahuala and so approach from the other side. There are two hospodojes in town. You book into one. It’s not the Ritz but better here than out in the cold.

Nahuala is an interesting town. It is very Maya which is nice but it is also quite gritty. But nice and authentic all the same.

San Pedro.: Damn hotel tout
Friday October 5, 2007, 40 km (25 miles) – Total so far: 5,129 km (3,187 miles)

There’s some more road works today. There is supposed to be a turnoff onto a minor road to lago to Atitlan but you miss it. You take the main road to the lake, through Solola and onto Panajachel where a boat awaits to take you to San Pedro.

The boat is not nice. You both get seasick while still in port. Then, because you sit at the front, are thrown up and hard back down on the seat every few seconds for the next half hour until you get to the other side.

In San Pedro some guy wants to take you to ‘his’ hotel. In reality he is just a tout, soon becoming a pain in the arse. You go to a different hotel but it doesn’t matter where you go, he still wants his commission. You tell the manager that he has now lost two clients because of this guy and go elsewhere on recommendation on passing tourists.

And now it is Friday night. Enjoy.

Some tenengro town.: Wicked ride in the back of a pick up.
Sunday October 14, 2007, 25 km (16 miles) – Total so far: 5,154 km (3,203 miles)

After a week in San Pedro staying with a local family and learning Spanish it’s time to move on. You meet up with Sofia again in Panajachel. She will stay there one more day while you go on ahead.

You load the bike onto a chicken bus and ride it all uphill back to the InterAmericana highway. It’s a real bitch getting the bike back down again. To load it onto the bus you lift it up to a guy half way up the ladder, then scramble up to the top of the bus for him to pass it back up to you. Unloading the bike the guy hands you the bike in one hand while you try to climb back down using only your left hand to hold the ladder. Tricky.

You get about twenty five km before the bike fucks up. It’s the cogs on the rear gear system. It broke off at the axle area and bent up good and proper. It takes all of two seconds to thumb a ride. A pickup stops and you jump in the back. The ride is rough for a while then the road is nice. It is scary. At least on a rollercoaster you know you will step off in the end. On the back of a pickup you don’t. Twice the driver has to brake suddenly to avoid a chicken bus when overtaking other traffic.

But you make it out okay in the end. It is Sunday so the bike shops are shut. Tomorrow morning you will sort it all out.

Some guy befriends you. You ask where a hotel is and he directs you. Then he asks for a quonzali for his tummy. You relent, giving him one. He then takes you to the hotel though the directions are enough. With the hotel in sight he then asks for two quonzalis, again making signs that he is hungry. You give him one more but he wants another again. Two is enough. The hotel is a bit expensive for what it is so you don’t stay there anyway. Soon another place is found and you settle in for the evening.

Antigua.: Another easy day
Monday October 15, 2007, 20 km (12 miles) – Total so far: 5,174 km (3,215 miles)

After a leisurely breakfast you go in search of a bike shop. No decent ones are to be found but one place does do the job well enough. In the process of fitting the new gears on he breaks the gear shifter. So a new one of those needs to be fitted also. But for nine US you do well enough.

And away you go. It’s about twenty km to Antigua. There are no signs so you need to ask directions all the time. You stop for lunch and it is just as well too as you need to turn off right there anyway. That saves a detour. You begin to feel that you went the wrong way there. This is all but confirmed when a sign points left to Chinantenango, the town you just came from.

Antigua is very touristy. But why? There doesn’t seem to be much special going on. On the other hand there isn’t anything bad about it either. Not sure where the Chileana is. She will probably get here tomorrow. Lots of different options to discuss. Tomorrow may involve a volcano tour. But six AM sure is an early time to leave.