Carnal Innocence

“Have you ever fantasized about making love in the rain?” Sean whispered

“I hadn’t thought about it before.” Caitlin ran her hand along her arm, sliding across the droplets that left her skin smooth to the touch. “The rain is so fresh and invigorating. And I guess it would make things kind of slippery.” She shivered. “There’s something about having water run across your body that makes you think of…”

Her voice trailed off as the innocence of it all faded. The water might be cool, but her skin was suddenly hot and flushed. Caitlin could feel Sean’s gaze on her lips, her breasts. Narrowed. Piercing. She squeezed her eyes shut and shivered.

She felt as if she’d been transported to another place. She could almost hear the sound of the rain, hushing the rest of the world and leaving her with the desperate agent who had kidnapped her and carried her away with him. She could almost feel his hot, wet kiss, his hands on her body, his mouth upon her straining breast. The heavy heat between her thighs became almost unbearable….

She wanted this. She wanted him.

Almost as much as she’d wanted her adventure in the first place.

Dear Reader,

When I was a kid, fairy tales and fantasy were a big part of my life. Lucky for me, they still are. After all, one of the best things about being a writer is that it gives me the chance to revisit my favorite themes. And in my opinion, you can’t beat Beauty and the Beast for being the perfect love story. Only for Blaze, I got the chance to take that theme in a whole new, sizzling direction!

My heroine, Caitlin McCormick, is a dreamer, too. Like me, she uses her imagination and creates exciting, adventurous fantasies to compensate for the mundane lack of adventure in her life. Until adventure comes walking through her front door in the form of a bad-tempered FBI agent with a tantalizing proposition. Animal magnetism aside, Agent Sean Maddox has the heart of a prince—if only the beauty he kidnaps for the weekend can help him find it….

This isn’t your average fairy tale—but I hope you’ll enjoy it! Let me know what you think about Caitlin’s fantasy-filled adventure. I love to hear from my readers. You may contact me at P.O. Box 5162, Grand Island, NE 68802-5162, or check out my Web site at www.juliemiller.org.

Enjoy,

Julie Miller

Carnal Innocence
Julie Miller

www.millsandboon.co.uk

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To the Fulton Public Library in Fulton, Missouri—for having a wall full of fairy tales and fantasies for me to read over and over again.

Contents

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

1

“GO HOME, Maddox. This case is washed up.”

Special Agent Sean Maddox took the letter from his partner, Thomas Hall, and angrily crushed it in his fist. “Two months of an airtight investigation shot to hell because one state court judge can’t keep it in his pants.”

“Even the high mucky-mucks of society are entitled to a vacation now and then.” Leave it to Thomas to try to reason this thing out.

“Is that what he called it? A vacation?” Sean spat out.

The whole case was slipping through his fingers, and Sean felt responsible. He’d promised Alicia Reyes he’d nail her kidnapper. She was just a kid—a sweet little thing the same age his sister had been when he’d started taking care of her all those years ago.

But the longer it took to get a judge’s ruling on critical evidence, the less likely it was they’d make their case against Marquez stick. And if that sleazebag walked…“Damn!” He wanted to say worse.

Special Agent Thomas Hall pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose, his reaction to the bad news as coolly reticent as Sean’s had been hot-tempered. “There’s no proof that Justice Rossini had an affair. His resignation letter states that the mere rumor of infidelity is enough to harm his family’s reputation. He’s resigning from the state bench effective immediately to keep the Rossini name out of the papers and go home to Roanoke to work on his marriage.”

“Did he honestly think an island getaway with his secretary tagging along to take notes wouldn’t raise a few eyebrows? We waited all last weekend for this guy to get back to Virginia. He’s been stonewalling us since Monday.” Sean shot the wad of paper onto the scattered files that littered his desktop. “He couldn’t have given us a ruling on that forensic evidence before he went on permanent vacation?”

But the rumors sounded all too familiar. Sean knew first-hand how gossip and separations and rampant libidos could tear a family apart. He’d watched his parents’ marriage go up in smoke when his British father’s military career kept him away from home for months at a time. Not even the unexpected arrival of Sean’s baby sister, Sabrina, could convince Admiral Roland Maddox to stay put in England.

Sean remembered encouraging his mother to move back across the Atlantic to her home in Nebraska—to be near her family while his father was abroad. He’d grown up thinking his mother was the one who was suffering. But Sean’s sympathy faded the day he discovered her trips to town for a college class had been to see the professor himself. In a hotel room.

As if that wasn’t enough, Sabrina had barely made it into third grade when a picture of the admiral with his female aide-de-camp had graced the London Times. Sean’s father hadn’t even bothered to deny the affair; the damage had been done. His mother had retaliated by announcing that she’d been discreet by comparison. The sparks flew. Sean had tucked Sabrina under his arm and faded into the background while their parents duked it out.

The divorce dragged on for two years. When those affairs ended, new partners quickly filled the empty spaces in their parents’ lives, but commitment was never part of the scenario. And the children were never more than an afterthought.

With that stellar example to learn from, Sean planned to do better. He’d found his most enduring relationship to be with the Bureau. But women were another matter altogether. Other than his relationship with his sister, whom he still called once a week at college, his longest relationship with a woman had been eight months, two weeks and a day.

It had taken him that long to notice Elise’s roving eye.

Elise had initially been turned on by the badge and the gun. She’d gotten a thrill from dating a real-life hero. But after the fun had worn off—about the time Sean was thinking about getting serious—he’d found her recent correspondence with her old college sweetheart. When he’d seen Elise and Frat Boy meet for dinner and had caught them kissing, Sean had known it was over with her.

Thank God he’d had the Bureau to return to the next morning. For eight years now, the job had never let him down.

Letting his shoulders expand and settle with a weary sigh, Sean picked up the goofy card that had come in the mail from his sister at Stanford University, and smiled. Sabrina might be the one woman he could count on in this world. Count on without question. Even if she did have the balls to razz him about his single status.

He had nothing against women, nothing against marriage.

He just wasn’t going to put his faith in either one of them.

“Something you want to share?” Thomas’s pointed question brought Sean back to the glassed-in confines of their tiny office.

“Nah. It’s just a note from Bree.” Sean smiled again, easily picturing Sabrina’s long wavy curls and mischievous grin. “Checking on me before she leaves the country for her next graduate studies project.”

Thomas adjusted his glasses. “You’re okay with that?”

Sean shrugged. He’d had a lot of years to get used to taking care of his little sister. He hadn’t had enough to get used to her being all grown up and gallivanting around the world to dig up buried treasures in pursuit of her Ph.D. in archaeology.

Another image, of a little girl with equally long hair—black instead of blond—filled his mind and pushed aside his sentimental thoughts. A simmering frustration tensed his muscles and pulled his mouth into a taut line. He tucked Sabrina’s card into his top drawer and looked across the desks to Thomas. “One thing I know I’m not okay with is Alicia Reyes’s kidnapper walking away because of a legal technicality.”

Sean swiped a hand over his jaw and scratched at his scraggly beard. He hadn’t shaved since yesterday morning. He and Thomas had been too busy piecing together the facts of the young girl’s kidnapping. Alicia was home safe now, but her kidnapper would never stand trial if they couldn’t come up with more than circumstantial evidence to warrant an arraignment.

“We were that close to nailing Marquez. So what if we entered that house without a warrant?” Sean thumped his finger on the desk. “We had the warrant in our hands before we opened the closet and found the ropes with the hair samples.”

“You’re preaching to the choir, Maddox.” Thomas stood and straightened his tie. By this time of the afternoon, Sean had no idea where he’d discarded his. “But without Rossini to give us the go-ahead on using that rope, Marquez is just a creepy guy who lives in the neighborhood.”

Thomas adjusted the holster he wore strapped around his shoulder, and picked up his suit coat from the rack beside their office door. Then he reached into his pocket and pulled out a small package. He tossed it to Sean. “Here. Do you even know it’s May 29?”

With easy reflexes, Sean caught the package. Closer inspection showed it to be a present.

“Happy birthday,” Thomas added.

Sabrina’s card had come early, before she took off for parts unknown. Since then, Sean had lost track of the days. Thomas, of course, never missed such details. “You shouldn’t have.” Sean dredged up a sly grin and ripped into the ribbon and paper. “What’s this supposed to be?” Thomas had given him a tiny, black, leather-bound book. He thumbed through the pages. Inside he found an assortment of names and phone numbers. “Noelle. Kris. Cassie. Sue. Sherry. Mary Ann.”

“Since Elise left, you don’t seem to have a little black book of your own, nor would you take the time to use one. So I thought I’d share some friends of mine.” Thomas walked over and tapped the book. “I put the names of six very nice ladies in there. They’re smart, they’re sexy, they’re available. And they’re willing to meet you, which is no small accomplishment on my part, I might add. Why don’t you call one of them and go celebrate your birthday tonight?” Thomas shoved aside a stack of files and sat on the corner of Sean’s desk. “What are you now? Thirty?”

“Thirty-two.”

“That’s almost over the hill, buddy. You’re good at your job, Sean. No one would ever argue that. But this stack of paperwork and that badge aren’t going to keep you warm at night.” Thomas shrugged, indicating the logic of his argument was irrefutable. “It’s not as if women don’t like you. You’re not bad-looking, you work out, you have that James Bond accent you inherited from your dad going for you.”

Sean leaned back in his chair and listened. As much as he might not want to hear it, he trusted Thomas’s opinion. No one could have predicted the two men would become such good friends. First of all, they were polar opposites in looks and personality. Thomas was tall and lanky. With his bookish demeanor and dark hair, he’d always reminded Sean of Gregory Peck playing Atticus Finch in To Kill a Mockingbird. Sean wasn’t quite as tall, and he was more likely to be cast as Schwarzenegger’s stand-in in some action flick. His blond hair always seemed to be out of place, while Thomas was neat as a pin. Thomas was a thinker. Sean trusted his gut.

But they understood each other. Inside. Where it counted. A woman could never do that.

“I notice you’re not wearing a ring either, buddy,” Sean stated. “You’re thirty-two also.”

Thomas rose and headed for the door. “True. But I’ve got plans tonight. I can get the job done and keep the ladies happy.” He turned in the open doorway. “There’s not another thing we can do on the Marquez case except hope that legal gets a postponement until we can get a ruling from another judge on that rope.”

Sean refused to give up hope. Alicia Reyes had never given up hope while she’d been held hostage. He reached for the nearest file and opened it. “There’s got to be another angle we can work here.”

Thomas shook his head. “Go home. Get laid. Get some sleep, if that’s how you want to celebrate. But do something for yourself. The case will still be here in the morning.”

Reluctantly, Sean agreed to the logic of Thomas’s argument. He was battle weary. But the thought of going home to his empty apartment wasn’t making him feel any peppier. He tossed the file back onto his desk and stood. “You’re right. We can finish saving the world tomorrow.”

“If you want, I’ll take you out for a beer,” Thomas offered.

“I thought you had plans tonight.”

“I do. But I can give her a call.”

Sean wouldn’t be such a spoilsport. “Forget it. I’m a big boy. I’ll find some entertainment on my own.”

“Okay, hotshot.” Thomas put two fingers to his brow and saluted him. “I hope your mission goes well tonight. See you in the morning. I’ll be expecting a full report.”

“Get out of here.” Once his partner had left, Sean reached behind his neck and rubbed at the tension that seemed to hang like a perpetual burden across his shoulders.

He really should take Thomas’s advice. Spend some time with a pretty lady. Share a few laughs. Do some serious catching-up on his involuntary celibacy of the past months.

At the very least he could call one of those names in Thomas’s black book and introduce himself. Maybe he could convince one of them to share some birthday cake with him.

His sex-deprived body jumped at a hazy image of a sexy naked lady licking frosting off his fingers. But as he squeezed his eyes shut and tried to bring the image into sharp focus, it faded in a puff of smoke. His eyes shot open and focused on the mounds of paperwork instead. Damn, his imagination stunk.

Maybe he’d do better to buy a six-pack and a Playboy and ease his frustrations that way.

With that much of a plan made, Sean rolled down the sleeves of his shirt and buttoned the cuffs. He was crossing the room to get his jacket when the door burst open.

“Hall. Maddox.”

“Chief?” The only man in the building who worked longer hours than Sean himself was Deputy Chief John Dillon. And judging by the scowl that creased his mahogany skin, his long hours were just getting started. “What’s up?”

Chief Dillon scoped the office. “Hall leave already?”

“It is after five.”

“Then you take a look at this.” He thrust a fax into Sean’s hands and started pacing. “That just came off the wire. The ambassador from San Isidro, Ramon Vargas, was found dead in his Washington, D.C., hotel suite this morning.”

Sean scanned the report for pertinent facts. “The local cops suspect foul play?”

“The San Isidrans are already on the horn demanding answers. Supposedly, he drowned in his bathtub, but there are bruises on his forearms and the back of his neck that indicate a struggle.”

“Isn’t this a case for the locals or the embassy police to handle? Why bring it to our attention?” Then he read the last line in the second to last paragraph. “Son of a bitch. Is this information accurate?”

“From a reliable informer.” Chief Dillon was shaking his head when Sean looked up. “I don’t believe in coincidence, either.”

“Vargas just returned from vacation on Pleasure Cove Island?”

“Sound familiar?”

With the thrill of the chase on again, Sean circled behind his desk and leafed through the scattered pile of papers. “Bingo.” He pulled out Judge Rossini’s itinerary for the past two weeks and compared it to the dates on Dillon’s report. “They were both on Pleasure Cove Island last weekend.”

He set the papers down side by side and searched for another piece of evidence. He pulled out the photocopy of a high-class, lowbrow invitation and read it out loud.

“You are cordially invited for a weekend of fun and frolic on Pleasure Cove Island. Security guaranteed.

“Meet at the New Harbor dock at 5:00 p.m. to be ferried across Muscongus Bay to my island home.

“Leave your wildest fantasies to us.

“All will be discreetly provided for you.

“Your host,

“Douglas Fairchild.”

“It’s a perfect setup,” the chief said. “Word is, if you have the money and the power, you can go there and do the nasty however and to whomever you want. Fairchild promises anonymity. There are no telephone communications to the island. He’s never allowed the press there. For medical emergencies, there’s a nurse on the premises. No one goes in once the party’s started. No one comes out until it’s done.”

“A regular playground for the rich and self-indulgent. You think Fairchild is blackmailing his guests?”

“Or maybe the guest list isn’t as anonymous as Fairchild wants it to be.”

Adrenaline pumped through Sean’s veins. He wasn’t out of the Reyes kidnapping case yet. If he could find something to prove Judge Rossini had been coerced into resigning, he’d have a whole new angle to pursue to keep Marquez behind bars. “Can I go check it out?”

Dillon grinned. “I was hoping you’d ask. Take tomorrow off. Make it a three-day weekend. The ferry to the island leaves promptly at five o’clock.” He was already backing out the door. “I’ll finagle you an invitation and a high-profile cover so you can go in as a guest. You get yourself the date.”

The adrenaline burned out in Sean’s veins. “You’re not assigning a female agent?”

“You’ve got fewer than twenty-four hours, Maddox.” Dillon talked as if he thought Sean was too thickheaded to figure out the obvious. “Take a girlfriend. Tell her you won a free vacation. Tell her you’re celebrating your birthday. It’ll be easier to behave as a couple with someone you’re already familiar with. And since this is strictly a fact-finding mission, I don’t see it as high risk. Call your girl. I’ll fill in Hall tomorrow morning so he can monitor your progress. The clock is ticking.”

“Yes, sir,” he called out to Dillon’s back, but the chief was already striding down the hallway.

Sean stood for a moment alone in the silence.

Who the hell could he call to spend a weekend at a sexual playtime resort like Pleasure Cove? Elise was out of the picture. Maybe…what was her name? Or else that blonde? “Damn.”

This was a sad testament to his workaholic lifestyle.

And he couldn’t exactly go to a bar or the produce aisle and try to pick up someone for more than a get-acquainted date.

Fear of failure warred with duty.

As always, duty won.

Sean snatched up the black book Thomas had given him for his birthday. He’d said these women were willing to meet him.

Maybe one of them would be willing to do a little bit more.

2

CAITLIN MCCORMICK TOOK one look inside her apartment door and knew she was in trouble.

“Cassie?” She thunked her overnight bag onto the tiled floor beside her and listened to her voice echo in the silence. “Come out, come out, wherever you are,” she recited in a sing-songy voice, and then listened again. “Cass, are you all right?”

She added the last out of polite courtesy, just in case the disorder of dishes, dust bunnies and dirty clothes strewn from room to room wasn’t anything more sinister than a testament to her roommate’s housekeeping skills.

“Maybe aliens snatched her up.” Just to be on the safe side, Caitlin quickly verified that all the rooms were empty. Leave it to Cassie to have a close encounter of the third kind while Caitlin was away. Her roomie could be off exploring brand-new worlds while she got stuck on the home planet doing housework.

Just like in one of Caitlin’s Star Trek books, it would be Cassie’s luck to get beamed aboard a starship to hang with the hunky captain while she got left on the surface to deal with a villainous Klingon.

“Hmm.” Caitlin raised her eyebrows and considered the possibilities. There was a definite appeal to the idea of saving the day. “I could just tame that bad boy and take over the planet myself.” She growled in her throat, imitating the imagined villain who would be at her mercy. “He’d be my consort. A warrior to serve my every need.” She closed her eyes and licked her lips, savoring an imaginary kiss as the rough-edged warrior took her to his bed.

The cool air that brushed across her wet, wanting mouth brought her back to reality. Her eyes popped open. No warrior. No lover.

No roommate, either.

But a very real mess to clean up.

“You shouldn’t have.” She waved off the imaginary audience that was cheering her dumb luck. “I’m so thrilled you’ve given me something meaningful to do with my life.” She’d learned to weed sarcasm out of her teaching, but the rest of her life was fair game for a loaded remark.

She shrugged out of her light-blue jacket and hung it in the closet. The reality of her life was that she had work to do. And as much as she wished she could ignore her responsibilities and just take off to indulge her latest whim the way Cassie did, someone had to clean up before ants found their way into their apartment.

Caitlin had spent the last week of May reconnecting with her father on Chesapeake Bay. She’d wanted to get away once the school year had finished, and she always enjoyed spending time with her dad. It had been relaxing—digging up crabs, sailing, chatting about the warm spring weather.

But after a couple of days of kicking back and relaxing, she’d found it boring. Not the time spent with her father. Her. She was boring. She’d had nothing more exciting to discuss than that she’d finally found a stylist who knew how to cut her curly hair without making it frizz like steel wool.

No wonder Retired Brigadier General Hal McCormick kept dozing off. She was reliable, sensible, boring old Caitlin. The only daughter in a long, tough tradition of rugged military men. She had no rank of distinction in front of her name like her brother Ethan’s “Major.” No notorious tag line to follow her name like her brother Travis’s “Action Man.”

She answered to the inauspicious title of Ms. McCormick. And her tag line went something like “Dull As Dishwater.” “Same Old, Same Old.” “Good Girl.”

Her father probably never dozed when one of her brothers was recounting a military mission or listing the names of dignitaries he’d hobnobbed with at a diplomatic function.

Caitlin carried her suitcase into her bedroom and set it down with a heavy sigh. While she unpacked, she pulled her cellphone from her purse and punched in her father’s number. She did share her brothers’ dutiful habits. Being responsible meant checking in as per her father’s request.

He picked up on the second ring. “McCormick.” Her father’s gruff voice held less bark than it had in years past, but Caitlin still found herself subconsciously anxious to please him.

“It’s me.”

The general’s tone never softened, but she knew there’d be a smile on his face. “How’s my best girl?”

Caitlin smiled at their secret code. “A-okay, Daddy.”

“Was your trip uneventful?”

Caitlin’s breath seeped out in a humiliated sigh. Uneventful. Was there any other way to describe her life?

But her father didn’t need to hear her complain. “I got home just fine.” Looking around her apartment, she despaired at how much work it needed, but he didn’t need to hear that, either. “I really enjoyed our visit.”

“Me, too.” He cleared his throat. Uh-oh. Prelude to fatherly lecture. “Be sure you call the doctor tomorrow. I’m sorry the chemicals we used to clean the boat got to you.”

“It was just an allergic reaction. A mild attack. I have an ample supply of all my meds,” she assured him. “My asthma is just fine. I’m fine.”

“Your mother used to take care of all that stuff when she was alive.”

“That was when I was a little girl. I’m twenty-seven years old now, Dad. I can take care of myself.”

Though straight talk and some TLC usually brought her father around to her point of view, some days—like this one—he made her feel as if she was stuck in a time warp. As if she was still that toddler who’d run out across the tarmac to welcome her daddy home from overseas, instead of an adult who still loved her daddy but who wanted the chance to make her own mistakes and earn her own triumphs without her omnipresent family waiting to oversee every choice she made.

After several more reassurances that her Memorial Day asthma attack had not been life threatening, Caitlin gave her father her love and promised to call again over the weekend.

“Unless you have a hot date…”

Caitlin laughed. She hadn’t realized hot date was in her father’s vocabulary. Without a division of troops to worry about any longer, the general focused all of his concerns on his three children. “Don’t worry, Dad. When I get serious about a guy, I’ll be sure you get to meet him.”

“Damn straight. I don’t want some sweet-talker like your brother Travis turning your head and gettin’ you into trouble.”

“Me? Trouble?” She wished. “I’m the most down-to-earth of all your children.” Not counting her rich fantasy life—that would remain her own little secret. “Don’t you trust me?”

“Of course I do. But you’re my youngest.” It was a needless reminder of how well her two older brothers and her father overprotected her. “You’re also the one I rushed to the hospital when Travis brought home that cat and you stopped breathing.”

He still thought she was that ten-year-old girl whose allergies and asthma hadn’t yet been diagnosed. Caitlin tried to remember this was love, not control, talking. “Don’t worry, Dad. I won’t let any man tell me what to do. I won’t let any man give me a cat, either.”

Her father laughed as she’d intended. “Good girl.”

Good girl. Responsible. Levelheaded. In other words…? Boring.

She needed to get a life. Maybe she just needed to live the one she had. She knew the one she wanted—one filled with adventure. One in which her father didn’t worry about her health. One in which her brothers didn’t request personal leave so they could check out her latest boyfriend to make sure he passed muster and minded his manners.

She wanted a life with the heady adrenaline rush of having her mind engaged in a creative challenge. A life filled with fascinating people. A life filled with great sex—okay, any sex—with a real, live, breathing man instead of one of her bad-boy fantasies. A life in which her body cooperated with her goals—where she’d push herself to her limits and then soar far beyond them.

An Olympic athlete.

A movie star.

An astronaut.

A spy.

“Yeah, right.”

She didn’t realize she’d muttered her frustration out loud until her father spoke. “What’s that, sweetie?”

Caitlin pulled herself to attention and covered her slip. “Nothing, Dad. I’d better go. I have some things to take care of here.”

“All right. Call if you need anything.”

They said their goodbyes and hung up. Caitlin pushed aside her gloomy spiraling thoughts. So she wanted independence and adventure, huh? Without alarming her father or putting half the Marine Corps on her tail?

Fat chance.

Maybe she’d best stick to her books.

Sure, she was doing her part to keep the public schools of Alexandria, Virginia, running smoothly. And her eighth-grade students could reconnoiter a sentence with the best in the country, uncovering subordinate clauses and adverbs long before they infiltrated high school. But what was she doing for fun and excitement in her life?

Caitlin picked up her roommate’s discarded sweater from the floor of the closet and sighed with fatigue. Today, it seemed, she was destined for nothing more laudable or exciting than cleaning up after Cassie.

She spotted the sticky residue of fast food on the plate beside the telephone on the entryway table and cringed. The leather-bound book that her roommate had used for a coaster caught her eye next. “Cassie!”

Caitlin picked up the paper cup and muttered an unladylike oath. The cup had been sitting there long enough to soften up and spring a leak. The book was now marked with a permanent circular tattoo. After trashing the cup, Caitlin thumbed through the pages, bemoaning the damage to one of her favorite stories.

“Sydney Carton, my hero.” She opened A Tale of Two Cities to the last page and read the final line. “‘It is a far, far better thing that I do, than I have ever done…”’ Caitlin closed the book and hugged it to her chest. “You got a bum deal, Syd.”

How many times had she rewritten the ending in her imagination? In her version, Dickens’s scoundrel of the French Revolution was rescued at the guillotine by a resourceful American woman. Let Charles Darnay have his sweet, good-girl heroine. Caitlin and Sydney always ended up in a little grass hut on the beach in Tahiti in her happy ending. Sometimes they ended up naked on the beach itself.

Caitlin returned the book to the hanging shelf above the telephone table. Being an English teacher as she was, the symbolism of closing the book on her fantasy life wasn’t lost on her. Was it really asking too much for fate to break her out of her rut?